Chapter 19 #3
Flashes of old memories surfaced in Eris’ mind, faded and confounding. Blue… Blue everywhere. Blue creatures, blue drawings, blue books. Things she had loved. Things that used to make her happy. Things she had forgotten.
There was something I loved before Denny?
It was like trying to peek into a room through frosted glass: blurred shapes and blurred colours without a name.
The one blue thing she remembered ever loving were her brother’s eyes—eyes that had been full of sorrow and exhaustion, but which had never denied her a look of tenderness.
“Hey.” Denny’s knuckles skimmed down her cheek. “Why so sad all of a sudden?”
“Nothing.” Eris seized Denny’s wrist to lean into her palm and borrow some of her warmth to defeat the cold she felt in her soul. “Sometimes it’s still hard to believe I’ve got you.”
“You’re such a silly sausage!” Denny pulled her into a crushing embrace that quite literally squeezed the blues out of Eris.
“My silly sausage,” she added softly, and Eris had to bury herself into her, hide her face in her hair, because the joy it gave her was embarrassingly disproportionate to the triviality of those three little words.
She owed so much to Denny, and only the smallest part of it consisted of material debts.
She could find a way to pay Denny back for the hospitality, the treats, the gifts…
But the love? When you took someone’s love, it was your own love you had to give in return.
Even when you barely knew what love was.
Eris knew that what Denny had done at the gym had been a protective gesture in more ways than one: to protect her from the guy’s harassment, but also, and maybe especially, to protect her from anything reckless she might have done if the guy had gone too far.
There were things—important things—that Eris had lost and forgotten. Time had swallowed them, along with other stuff that was probably better off buried. But there were other things—new, equally important things—that she had found and which she would never take for granted.
There was Denny.
Denny, who would’ve done anything for her.
Whose greatest joy was to give and to nurture.
Who had laid out her beautiful, sunlit world at Eris’ feet and had taken her in, fed her, healed her, kept her safe, just because she could.
And Eris couldn’t even swallow her pride to accept the job she was being offered.
She’d be able to watch over Denny and keep doing all that brainy stuff that drove Denny insane.
She’d be paid to do it, which was her only qualm, but it was getting less and less bothersome by the day.
She may be stubborn, but so was Denny, if not more, and Eris was coming to accept that this was a war not worth fighting, not if she wanted to be there for Denny in every way she was capable of.
“I’ll do it.”
“Huh?”
Eris exhaled a long sigh. She’d promised she would stop trying to quantify their affection for each other and this was the first step to prove her commitment.
“I’ll work for you.” I’ll keep you safe, too.
She was expecting a cheerful exultation, barely contained excitement, which was likely still happening inside of Denny, even though all she did was squeeze Eris impossibly tight.
It took her a while to pull back, a little pout on her sweet face.
“I pinky promise I won’t be all over you every spare moment.
” She held up her little finger, but Eris shoved it down.
“Take it back. Right now.”
The sun itself would have paled before the radiance of Denny’s smile.
She kissed Eris so enthusiastically that they fell flat on the couch, one on top of the other.
A cascade of turquoise-streaked blonde waves tickled Eris’ face as the kiss deepened with an urgency Denny had never shown before.
Warm, wet lips trailed down the column of Eris’ neck, idle nips sneaked in between kisses spreading goosebumps everywhere.
Ragged breaths. Denny’s hands on her waist, holding, claiming.
“Denny,” she gasped when a gentle suction sent a ripple of arousal down to her core. “Don’t be cruel.”
There was a moment of stillness, then, as if electrocuted, Denny withdrew, sitting back on her heels, flushed and more gorgeous than ever. She looked uneasy.
Eris’ eyebrows knit, hands rising to her hips.
What’s wrong?
Denny seemed lost for a second. Slowly, her expression softened and she rubbed a reassuring hand on Eris’ chest. It felt like an apology, which wasn’t what Eris was looking for, so she took Denny’s hand and pressed it harder down so that Denny could feel the hammering of her heartbeat.
After a moment of hesitation, Denny’s fingertips dug into her skin, something dark and raw glowing in her eyes.
She looked away, biting her lip, but Eris squeezed her hand until she looked back at her.
It’s okay, Sunshine. Not now is fine. Never is fine. Give me a smile, please.
And, just as if she’d heard it, Denny’s body relaxed and a small, grateful smile bloomed on her lips. She bent down, pressed a light peck to Eris’ lips, whispering ‘I love you’, and that was enough.