33. Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Two
Leif
The house is quiet. Too quiet. The ocean isn’t far, just down the path in the back of the house, and past some trees.
When I’m on the porch outside in the back, I can hear the waves crashing against the sand.
But when I’m inside, with all the doors and windows closed, they drown out any sound. It’s like I’m in a fortress.
A very lonely, large fortress.
I don’t know why I stay here. It feels a little weird—a little obsessive maybe. What if Aliko comes back to find me in his home, when he doesn’t want me here? I should be able to take a hint. He broke up with me.
Yet something about that just doesn’t feel right and it’s enough of something to keep me here.
It’s been almost a week since I’ve been here instead of home.
The furniture was delivered, and I set it up and hung the paintings Aliko and I picked out together.
I shopped for the rest of the things we needed but forgot about, mostly kitchen stuff and other small things.
We only had one set of bed sheets, so I bought a few back ups because of course we need those.
I got different pillows for the bed, because the set we got was awful.
I had to order a few more sets of curtains because we must have miscounted the number of windows in this place.
I reach for another slice of cold pizza. I’ve had it since the place opened at eleven this morning and it’s all I’ve eaten today. Now it’s nearing six. The sun will start going down soon. I’ll stay here on the couch, like I always do, until I can no longer keep my eyes open.
I’ll wake up at some point tomorrow, confused about where I am for about two seconds until I remember I’m alone in the house Aliko and I were supposed to move into together.
I munch on the pizza that’s hard and cold, but I don’t have energy to make anything. There’s only one slice left, so I finish that before draining the bottle of water and grabbing the blanket to pull up to my chin.
My gaze stays on the TV, but I’m not really seeing it.
My eyes keep unfocusing, and I can’t tell if it’s because I’m tired or not.
But then I drift into sleep—or something close to it—but not for long.
There’s a sound. Scratching… metal? I blink and sit up, straining my ears to figure out what the hell I’m hearing.
Then there’s a squeak and the unmistakable sound of the front door closing.
I leap to my feet and dash out of the living room, skidding to a halt in the foyer the moment my eyes land on Aliko in his half-kraken form. He’s shirtless, with just a pair of swim shorts on. No shoes.
“Are you real?” I ask.
I don’t know why those words come out of my mouth, but they do.
He gives me a sympathetic look, a sad look so unlike Aliko.
“I’m real, baby,” he says.
The next thing I know, I’m in his arms—all of them—and he’s holding on to me so tightly I can’t breathe.
Who needs to breathe? Not me. Not now. Not while he’s finally here.
“Where have you been?” I ask, the words raspy as they come out of my mouth.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
I squeeze him tighter. He squeezes me tighter.
Words can wait. Right now, I just need this.
We stay in the foyer for a long time, until Aliko lifts me and carries me into the living room.
Aliko sits on the couch, with me in his arms. I can’t let go of him. I won’t. I still don’t fully believe this is real.
“You’re really here?” I ask softly.
He nods, his chin brushing against my head.
“Yeah, I’m really here.”
I pull away, to look up at him. He looks exactly as he did the last time I saw him. Maybe a little tired. Running my hand along his cheek, I lean in and kiss his lips.
He doesn’t kiss me back.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“I’m sorry,” he says again.
Now I nod, not knowing what to say to that.
“My father, he—” He clears his throat.
“Your father? Is that who you left with?”
That would make sense. Hell, it’s the only thing that really makes sense.
“Yes. I still don’t know why.”
I shift so I’m more comfortable and can see him a little better, but I don’t go far. I can’t. I need to be near him, convince myself this is real.
“It’s okay,” I tell him.
“No,” he says. “I shouldn’t have gone. I should have stayed. I—” His gaze flicks to me, and a tear slips down his cheek. “I’m sorry I left you.”
I hold his face in both of my hands, looking him right in the eyes.
“You’re here now. You came back to me. I knew you would. That’s why I’m here.”
He takes a deep breath and lets it out. “I don’t deserve you.”
“Don’t talk like that. Of course you do. Just… tell me where you’ve been.”
“In the ocean,” he says. “With my colony. It’s all… very confusing.”
“Why?”
“It just doesn’t feel real. After being here for so long, going back there was like a bad dream.”
I nod, then lean down to rest my head on his shoulder. “We don’t need to talk about it now. Are you hungry?” I sit up again. “I can make you food. I—”
Aliko pulls me closer to him when I try to get up. “I just need you to stay with me.”
I smile and settle against him. “I can do that. I want to do that.”
Aliko and I haven’t let go of each other, but we have shifted to lie down.
I want to suggest we go to the bed where we have more room, but I sort of like that we’re squished together like this.
The room is dark, the sun long having set, and the TV sleep timer going off.
I’ve drifted in and out of sleep, but no matter what time I wake, I can tell Aliko hasn’t slept a wink.
“Are you okay?” I whisper, running my hand along his human arm until I find his hand. I link our fingers.
“I don’t think so,” is what he says back, his voice shaky.
“How can I help?”
“Just stay with me.”
“I will. Always.”
It falls silent again, and I drift into sleep.
When I wake the next time, the sun is coming up and Aliko is finally asleep.
I don’t want to leave him, but I have to pee and he needs to eat.
So I untangle myself from his limbs, careful not to wake him.
Once on my feet, I cover him with the blanket, make sure the curtains are drawn tight so the light doesn’t disturb him, then I go into the kitchen that is thankfully on the other side of the house.
There isn’t much food here, but we have pancake mix and eggs, so that’s what I make. I’m in the middle of cooking everything when I realize that in order for him to eat, I’ll have to wake him up and maybe he needs sleep more than food. I sigh, running the back of my hand across my forehead.
“What the hell am I doing?” I whisper to myself.
“Looks like you’re making me breakfast,” Aliko says from behind me.
I whirl around, and there he is. Standing in the kitchen. I’ve waited for this for weeks now. And here he is. Just so simply. Just like that.
“I am.” I smile. “Pancakes and scrambled eggs. It’s all we have right now.”
“It’s perfect. How can I help?”
“You can make coffee?”
“I’ll try my best.”
I huff a laugh as he walks to the cabinets, pulling them open one by one until he finds the canister of coffee and filters.
The kitchen is spacious with more cabinet space than we need, and there is a large arch that leads directly to the dining room, and another door that leads into the hall that leads to the sunroom. Seeing the layout in photos is different than being here. This house is perfect.
Aliko fiddles with the coffee pot, his brow furrowed as he presses buttons and tries to figure out how to make it work. I smile to myself as he does his thing, letting him figure it out on his own. If he needs my help, he will ask.
He doesn’t. A minute later, the coffee starts to brew. It probably won’t be the best coffee, but he did it all by himself.
We eat breakfast together like we have countless times before, only this time, there’s tension. It’s new. It’s never been like this before. We eat in silence. Not entirely awkward, but not comfortable either.
When we’re done, Aliko cleans up while I finish my coffee at the table. He sits back down and picks up his cup to sip from. I’m not sure what to say, but there are a million things I want to say. None of it feels right though.
Why did you leave? Why did your father show up? Why did you stay for so long? What made you decide to come back?
That’s only the beginning of it. Never mind all the other stuff we have to work out. I mean, he just left me, and though I’m glad he’s back, I can’t forget it.
“Does anyone else know you’re back?” I ask.
“No,” he says. “I only came to you.”
That has my chest warming a little. He came to me. All he cared about was me.
“You should let them know.”
“Later.” He puts his mug down, turning to face me more. “How can I fix this?”
“Well, everyone just assumed you went back to the ocean, so—”
“I mean us, Leif.”
“Oh,” I say, my voice small. I put my mug down and sit back in my chair.
“Can I… fix this?” he asks carefully.
I take a breath before meeting his gaze. “We can fix this, yes. We need to talk about a lot of things. It’ll take time, but nothing has changed for me. I still want to be with you.”
“I want to be with you too,” he says quickly. “It’s all I want. I’m so angry for leaving, and I don’t know why I did.”
“Yeah, you said that.” I try not to sound bitter, but I can’t help it.
I am.
“My father showed up and I just… cowered. I went with him, even though I didn’t want to.
He’s the leader of our colony, and maybe I stayed because I felt like that was my life, and what I was born to do.
Then I was worried he’d tell everyone and I’d be killed.
My body felt right, but my head…” He shakes it.
“It’s never felt right under the ocean.”
“What made you come back?”
“My father took my amulet. I’d been looking for it. And my mother… she led me to it.”
“I thought they didn’t want this for you?”
“They didn’t. But something must have changed. When I came up to land, my father was there again. I’m still very confused by our conversation, so I don’t want to get into it, but basically he told me to have a good life—and not in the worst way.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. It’s hard to believe.”
“It’s hard to believe you’re here,” I say. Aliko frowns. I offer my hand. “We can fix this,” I say firmly. “I promise you, we can. Everything will be okay.”
The corner of his lips twitch, and when I smile, he does too.
I really do think everything is going to be okay.