Chapter Twenty-One #7
When I spoke, the words came with a flood of emotions that spilled out of me.
I was certain Ava could feel it the same way I felt her intention in my bones.
“It’s true that I had plans to stage a coup if Cassiel was unable to rule, because I didn’t trust my father.
But I didn’t plan to lock you up. I wanted you to help me take over, for us to do it together.
But when Cassiel died, I got terrified of losing you.
I never would’ve done that if he hadn’t perished.
I thought I was protecting you. I was afraid of losing the people I cared about most. I wanted to save everyone I loved. Not destroy them.”
The Spirit orb pulsed with Ava’s voice. “We tried to save everyone, but we can’t save them until we save ourselves. Are you with me?”
“I’m with you. Always,” I promised.
The world turned on itself again, sending me tumbling out of the vision. I slammed back to the earth, and the sound of rain returned. Ava gasped from beside me, and I reached out to find her now that the Spirit orb had vanished.
She gripped my arms to steady herself. “Charlie, tell me that was you in that vision.”
“I was there with you,” I gasped. “But it was more than just you. It was like a piece of your spirit had opened up to me. One I’m not sure you even have access.”
Ava swallowed audibly. “I don’t know how that was possible. You destroyed my half of our soul when you severed our bond.”
“I know. But it still came through all the same.”
“I heard everything you said. It was like your words didn’t matter as much as your intention. It was so… profound.”
“I could finally see your heart for its truth,” I agreed. “It was like I was pulled out of my own mind and put into yours, unclouded by my own perceptions.”
“Yes.” Ava’s voice cleared, like she could understand things for the first time. “I understand. I… I accept you.”
I managed to speak the words, breaking upon me like the fall of night. “I accept you.”
Everything changed. Wind swept through the trees as my elemental powers flooded back into me. The rain let up, and the sounds of nighttime insects filled the air.
Ava shifted to crawl toward the opening of our shelter to peer outside. “The storm ended. The skies are clearing to reveal the stars.”
“I can feel it.” I lifted my palm and sent tiny whirlwinds of Air swirling over her skin. She laughed like it tickled, and I smiled. “My powers are back.”
“I guess that means Oberi approves, which means so do my parents. Our work is done here. You can use your Air powers to fly us off this island.”
“Then let’s get you back into a warm bed.”
“And someplace with indoor plumbing,” she added.
I cradled Ava in my arms and helped her out of the shelter. She clung to me so tightly that I couldn’t bear to let her go. I didn’t think she wanted me to, either, because she leaned her head on my shoulder and drew a deep, relaxing breath.
I didn’t place her back in her chair. Instead, I commanded my Air power to swirl beneath my feet and flew back toward the palace with her in my arms, her chair soaring behind us.
Ava snuggled against me as we flew back under the cover of night. We landed on our private balcony, and I carried her inside. I set her on the bed. I fluffed a pillow and placed it behind her back for support, then sat beside her.
“Thank you, Charlie. For everything.”
I stroked her hair back. “Of course. I’m here to help.”
“I know, but it’s taken me a long time to trust that.”
“Are you saying… you trust me?” My heart lifted at the hope that something between us that I’d broken had been repaired.
“I always have, in a way. I could always trust you with my life. I’ve just… struggled to trust you with my heart. But maybe that’s more of a problem with myself than it is with you.”
“It’s not. You gave me your heart, and I broke it. I understand why you’re holding back.”
“Still. I can’t keep holding back and expect trust to be built without giving you a second chance to take it in your hands.”
“It’ll take time to earn your trust back, because I know what it’s like to break you. It’s not a mistake I’m willing to make again, ever.”
“Then I need to ask you a question. Will you return the things I gave up?”
I nearly burst with delight when she said that. “Of course. Just let me know what you need, and consider it done.”
Ava paused.
“What is it?” I asked apprehensively. Did she want to change her mind?
“I just realized… I don’t need any of that stuff,” Ava said.
“They’re just things, and I made so many people happy when I gave them away.
When I donated my wedding dress, it was to a girl who needed it.
I was blessed enough to share my abundance with all of Ilamanthe.
I think it’s more important that I trust you enough to ask, even if I don’t actually need you to restore my things. ”
Her words felt as holy as being in the presence of a deity, because my heart expanded to unimaginable proportions. When Ava had said she moved back in and took only what she needed, I didn’t understand what she meant at the time.
Now I heard her loud and clear— all she needed was me.
I’d never felt so profoundly loved. It hit me how incredibly significant this whole ritual truly was.
Ava had relinquished her things because she loved me.
She was a materialistic person who would never do this for someone she didn’t care about, but she gave all those things away because she considered me more valuable than all of it.
Nobody ever thought of me in that way before. Most people didn’t even bother to consider me, but even now, I remained the sun to her.
As touched as I was, I couldn’t stand the thought of not giving back to her in the way she’d gifted all her love to me. I had to make this right.
My hand went from her hair to her shoulder. I could feel the thin fabric of her dress, which had worn from so many washes. “You can’t wear this dress forever.”
Ava scoffed. “Of course not, but I can get different clothes. I don’t need my old ones back. I need a fresh start anyway. We can start with a new wardrobe.”
I couldn’t stand the thought of her wearing that dress for another day.
I wished to forgo my pledge to give up my illusion magic, and use my Elf powers again just to make her something to wear.
I could create a silk nightgown for her in a second, and a hundred more dresses she could choose from every morning.
But resorting to magic to fix this would negate the entire point of the ritual.
I had to do this in the way of our ancient ancestors, and get her things back without the use of magic— just as I’d done when I climbed that mountain, and how we worked together on that island.
As Ava’s powers proved, magic was never a guarantee, and I wanted to provide for her without it.
“There’s got to be something you regret giving up and want me to get back for you,” I insisted. “What about Monica’s armband?”
Ava hesitated, like she wasn’t sure. “I gave it to a child who needed a friend. I couldn’t possibly ask for it back.”
I picked up on the meaning behind those words.
Maybe I knew her that well by now, but I saw the truth she wouldn’t admit, even to herself.
She could never give Monica up, and that armband meant the world to her.
She wanted it returned, but she knew how much it meant to that child.
She was putting that child’s wants before her own, and as much as I admired her for it, I wasn’t sure that was the right decision.
“You don’t have to ask for it back,” I said. “That’s my job.”
“Charlie, that’s literally stealing from a child.”
“Which is supposed to be easy, right?” I teased.
Ava snorted. “Just because it’s easy doesn’t make it okay. We’re trying not to be the bad guys anymore, remember?”
I held my hands up in surrender. “I promise my days of thieving are behind me. I won’t be stealing anything.”
“You better not,” she warned. “It’s okay, Charlie. I’m ready to let her go.”
She wasn’t. She never would be. I wasn’t sure how I was going to get that armband back, but I’d figure out a way to do it that didn’t hurt anyone, only help everybody involved.
Ava reached out for me, and something weird happened then— something so natural I didn’t think either of us noticed. I found myself lowering myself to the bed beside her, and Ava stroked her fingers through my hair, welcoming me in.
I lay near, taking in her warmth and the slow rhythm of her breath. “I’ll find a way to restore your possessions. I promise. Then we’ll be able to bring our baby home and be a family.”
It was all I ever wanted, and she knew it, too. Her fingers stilled in my hair, and she shifted to wrap her arms around me. By the ancestors, it felt amazing to be so close to her. I never wanted this… us… to end.
It would kill me if it did.