ARIA
I pull the brush through my hair and can’t seem to wipe the smile off my face.
Yes, there is still something between Penn and me, but maybe it’s different now. He’s lighter this morning. The smile is back on his face, and I can’t remember the last time I saw it. He’s joking around, he’s playful, and he can’t seem to keep his hands off me.
“What are you smiling about?” I ask him.
His smile gets even bigger as he looks at me through the mirror. “What do you think I’m smiling about?”
I set my brush on the counter and turn to lean against it, facing him. “I don’t know. Tell me.”
He puts his hands on my waist and pulls me to him. “I’m thinking about last night. About how good you taste and about how I want more.”
His eyes darken, and he leans in to kiss me.
I kiss him back, but before it gets too heavy, I lean away and look at him. “That’s what you were thinking about?”
He laughs. “Yeah. Well, that and every way I made you come.”
I lean my forehead against his chest as heat rises in my cheeks. “It was a good night.”
He gasps. “Good? Did you just say it was a good night?”
His hands trail up, and he cups my breasts through my blouse. “I guess I’m going to have to do better next time.”
I roll my eyes. “Three orgasms in one night is pretty good, Penn. It was a great night. Awesome. The best.”
He nods like he already knew that. “That’s what I thought. We may need a repeat tonight.”
I lift my eyes to his. “So you’re really taking the whole day off today?”
He cups my cheek, and I press into his touch.
His thumb strokes my skin as he forces me to look up at him.
“We’re going to my brother’s ranch. I’m going to help him, and you ladies are going to do whatever you do.
I’m sure if Skyler’s involved, we’ll eat.
” His eyes drop to my mouth. “And when we come back here, I want you naked and riding my dick as soon as we walk in the house.”
I gasp. “Did you really just say that? Now I’m going to be thinking about it all day. I’m going to be a mess by the time we get home.”
He groans. “I might have to take care of you while we’re there. Sneak you into a stall and give you some relief.”
My body trembles, but I force myself to pull away.
We’re already running late, and if we keep going like this, we’ll never make it.
As much as I want to stay in bed with my husband all day, I know Ozzy inviting us over is a big deal.
He’s been through so much since Valerie died, and the fact that he asked his brothers to come help him on the ranch means something.
Penn even took a vacation day for it. That means something too.
I put a hand on his chest to hold him back. “If you keep going, we’ll never get out of here, and we don’t want to miss this.”
He blows out a breath and looks down my body like I’m naked instead of standing here in old jeans and a T-shirt. “Do you know how good you look right now?”
I glance down at my clothes and then back at him. “Are you kidding? These jeans are at least three years old.” I tug at the old, holey denim.
He wiggles his eyebrows. “Well, you wear them just right.”
I laugh and move back in front of the mirror. “Forget it, Dr. Brody. We have places to be.”
He comes up behind me and buries his face in my neck. With a big inhale, he sighs. “Fine, but I’m pulling you into a stall later because there’s no way I’m looking at this ass all day and not having you.”
He grabs my butt, and I lean back against his chest.
A big part of me wants to stay right here and enjoy this closeness, but another part of me wants to be with his family today. I want them to see this side of Penn again too. I know they’ve missed him.
He kisses my neck right below my ear, and my body trembles. The man knows exactly what he’s doing. I give him a stern look in the mirror. “We should probably get going.”
He groans but walks over to his side of the bathroom. “I like it when you tell me what to do, Aria.”
My insides are gooey, but I force myself to keep getting ready. I’m putting my earrings in when I glance over at him in front of his sink. “So…”
He smiles. “Yes, my love?”
I smile back. “I’m ovulating. I mean, yesterday and maybe today.”
I start rambling about my temperature and the app and all the things I’ve been tracking, but when I look at him in the mirror, the Penn from last night is gone. The playful smile has disappeared, and his jaw is tight. Heck, his whole body has gone stiff.
“You should have told me,” he says.
I stare at him. “What?”
He shakes his head and walks out of the bathroom.
I’m so stunned that it takes me a second to move, then I follow him into the bedroom.
Our bed is still a mess from last night, and with nothing else to do, I start yanking the sheets straight as anger rises in my chest. “I thought you’d be happy.”
He claps his hands together once. “Well, I’m not. You should have told me. I would think that’s something you’d mention to your husband instead of keeping it from me.”
I gasp and point at him. “There’s no way you’re saying that to me right now.
” I throw a hand up. “First of all, you’re the one keeping secrets.
Second of all, we’ve talked about this. We both want kids.
We’re not using protection, Penn. No, I didn’t think I had to make an announcement before we had sex. ”
He lets out a hard breath. “You should have told me.”
“Why?” I ask, my voice rising. “So you could avoid touching me?”
His face goes pale, but probably what freaks me out the most is the way he goes completely silent. And suddenly, I know this is something, but I don’t know what.
He runs a hand through his hair. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Then what did you mean?”
He doesn’t answer fast enough.
I shake my head. “We both know there’s pressure. I feel it too, Penn.”
“Pressure?” he snaps. “You’re under pressure? What kind of pressure are you under? I’m the one with the demanding job. I’m the one who—”
My eyes widen, and he stops as soon as the words are out, but it’s too late.
Never in all our time together has Penn ever treated my job like it doesn’t matter. What I do is important. I know it, and he knows it. So for him to stand here and act like I don’t understand pressure makes my stomach turn.
He comes toward me with his palms up. “Aria, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
I shake my head and hold the pillow to my chest. “No, you shouldn’t have.”
“I know. I’m sorry.” He looks lost as he stares at me. “I don’t know what happened. I just snapped.”
I look at him, trying to make sense of the man in front of me. “Does it bother you that I’m ovulating?”
He closes his eyes, and my heart drops.
“This doesn’t make sense,” I say. “We’ve talked about wanting kids. We’re not using protection. We both know it’s eventually going to happen.”
Something flickers across his face. I try to decipher it, but one emotion after another appears before I can take it all in. But I do see the anger. It’s still there.
I take a step back. “Or has that changed for you?”
He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out.
I press my hand to my stomach as the words come out in a whisper. “Do you not want to have kids with me?”
He pauses. It’s only a few seconds, but it feels like forever.
I bend forward like he punched me.
“Aria—”
I shake my head and back away from him. “No.”
“I do,” he says quickly. “I swear to God, I do.”
But he’s too late.
The answer should have come right away. It wasn’t a hard question. Heck, it should have been as easy as breathing for him, and the fact that it wasn’t scares me.
I clutch the pillow tighter to my chest, staring at the man I love more than anything. “I don’t believe you.”
His face crumples. “Honey—”
“Don’t.” My voice breaks, but I force myself to keep going. “Don’t call me that right now.”
He looks like he wants to reach for me, but I step back before he can. “You don’t get to touch me after that,” I tell him.
Pain flashes across his face, but I can’t let myself care. My chest feels like it’s caving in. God, is this what it feels like when your heart is breaking?
“I need a minute,” I say. Then I turn and walk into the bathroom, shutting the door before he can stop me.
The second I’m alone, I press my hands to the counter and stare at myself in the mirror. Last night, I thought maybe we were finding our way back to each other. This morning, I’m not even sure my husband wants the life we’ve been trying to build. And the worst part is, I still don’t know why.