The Pain We Nurture

Threats All Through

The next couple of weeks ran by quickly. Colin worked longer hours, trying to prepare for the holidays. Sometimes bringing along Olivia, and sometimes she stayed at home depending on her mood.

The lighting company Colin hired set up orange lights all over the exterior of the house, and he paid to have huge blow-up pumpkins on the property. Along with an elaborate pumpkin decoration at the front gate, fountain, and the front door. It cost, but he felt it was pretty. He took her home late that night, wanting to surprise her with the decorations while it was getting dark.

I can’t wait for her to see it, I hope she loves it, he thought. He’d been anxious about it the entire day.

Colin waited for Mary’s text, informing him the decorators were done before he took Olivia home. He took out his phone and recorded her reaction as they pulled up on the property.

Olivia surprised him with her reaction. She squealed with excitement, clapping her hands and laughing hard at the monstrous blow-up monsters and pumpkins. She launched herself at him in joy as they drove slowly up the drive.

Olivia took her own phone out as they got out of his SUV, jumping into his arms and sharing a slow sweet kiss with him.

They both laughed as they turned three hundred sixty degrees in each other’s arms recording them kissing with all the decorations in the background of their video.

Colin set Olivia on the hood of his SUV. Feeling content, appreciative, and joyful. His heart thudded painfully in his chest as he leaned into her.

As Colin kissed her soft warm lips, feeling her curves pressed against his body, he almost said he loved her. Yet, he stopped himself, still probing this new feeling of his. The first time he knew that he truly felt it in his adulthood. He buried his face in her hair and inhaled her unique scent, trying to shut down these feelings that scared him, and made him feel alive. He felt like he could soar when she was around.

***

A week and a half later, Vanessa, Allison, and Johnathan all came to the house to dress for Halloween. They planned to take Allison trick or treating in Colin’s neighborhood and Johnathan was especially excited, wanting another chance to be around Vanessa. The poor man had caught some serious feelings for the curvy, fiery redhead.

Olivia caught Johnathan staring at Vanessa on multiple occasions, looking quite lovesick.

They were all crammed into the primary bathroom where Vanessa was helping with Johnathan’s costume. He dressed up as the Mask and required a lot of green makeup, causing Colin to threaten him with a renovation bill if the green shit didn’t come out of his vanity. Johnathan hit Colin across the shin with his expensive cane, causing Olivia to roll her eyes at Vanessa, mumbling “billionaire problems.”

The men gave a narrow-eyed gaze at them instead of fighting each other.

Olivia donned a woman”s costume version of Chucky the killer doll, complete with the wild hairstyle that took a whole can of hairspray to accomplish. Vanessa dressed up as Anne of Green Gables with a straw hat and basket of books. Colin chose to step out as Robin Hood, and he topped off the look with an expensive bow and arrow set.

Colin smiled when Olivia slowly raked her gaze down his form with a seductive look in her eyes. He knew he looked devilishly handsome, and her approval did much to stroke his ego.

Allison was dressed as Pippi Longstocking, and Olivia was currently braiding her hair. With a small smile on her face. Colin knew she was thinking of her mother at that moment. And in a quick motion that no one noticed, he snapped a picture of them together.

They took a golf cart instead of walking, mindful of Allison’s illness, and the huge distances between properties.

A couple that lived on a property a few homes over wanted to take a picture of Johnathan and Olivia. Colin got a kick out of Johnathan raising Olivia over his head as she brandished her fake bloody knife in the air. She screamed with terror; afraid he was going to drop her.

After taking another snapshot of them all posing together as their respective characters two hours later, they made their way home in the golf cart.

They made out like a bandit with candy, tossing it all on the kitchen island and divvying up the proceeds. Colin disappeared to the patio to start the fireplace and heat lamps, and Vanessa disappeared to put Allison to bed.

Johnathan, Colin, and Olivia went upstairs to shower off their costume makeup and get changed into comfortable pajamas before reconvening on the patio. Each of them spreading out on the plush patio couches. Colin noticed that Johnathan and Vanessa were getting rather cozy, and she was leaning back on his shoulder. They shared the Hermes blanket from Colin’s lounge.

Olivia leaned back completely on Colin as he stroked her damp hair. He wished she’d let him blow dry it before they went back downstairs, but she didn’t want to keep them waiting. They made her in charge of picking a slasher movie, as she dressed like the most violent character to dress up as. She rather reluctantly picked a scary one, not wanting to seem like a chicken. Colin noticed Vanessas’ side eye and small smirk before she burrowed deeper into Johnathan and the blanket.

They both watched as Vanessa sighed contentedly, sipping from a glass of wine and taking a small bite of candy. Olivia looked at the baby monitor she’d set up for Allison, making sure it was turned up before the movie started. She took a big swig of her mixed vodka drink, turning her head to make sure Colin was okay before she got comfortable. He noticed she was already pretty inebriated.

Johnathan silently motioned for Colin”s attention, prompting him to check his phone.

Hey bro, do you mind if I stay over, and Vanessa and I use one of the spare bedrooms again? -J. Dawg

Colin glanced up sharply.

Bro, I will fucking kill you if you damage my room again. The shit cost nine grand to fix the damn room. And that’s not even counting getting a new bed! -C. Kent

Johnathan flipped him off secretly as he texted him back on his phone.

Why are you acting like you don’t like spending money, bro? Besides, I paid you back, didn’t I? -J. Dawg

Colin rolled his eyes, jostling at Olivia’s slight jerk, her elbow digging into his ribs. He grunted softly, waiting for her to settle before he tapped out a response.

Whatever man, can you just keep Vanessa quiet this time? You know what, just use the guest house please. And don’t touch ANY of my equipment. We will keep an eye on Ally tonight. -C. Kent

Johnathan nodded his head slightly in response.

Colin put the phone down as Olivia suddenly gasped and jumped so hard she almost tipped her whole drink on him. He caught her to him in surprise, glancing over at Vanessa, who was laughing her ass off at them. Her gray eyes sparkled in delight as Olivia suddenly started crying, making him look at her in alarm. He turned furious eyes on Vanessa.

“You’re literally not going to sleep for the next three years,” Vanessa gasped, gulping down her wine. “She’s terrified of scary movies,” she giggled, leaning back again against Johnathan with a self-satisfied smirk.

“I wasn’t expecting us to sleep much anyway,” Colin said as he grinned down at Olivia. The comment broke through the fear momentarily and made her smile.

“And you can’t send her to my house when you can’t get her to sleep, either,” Vanessa shot over at him, grinning wickedly.

Such a lovely big sister, Colin thought, shaking his head at her.

Turns out, Olivia was a big baby and had curled up into a ball on top of him by the end of the movie, her arms wrapped hard around him. Her face was buried as deep as she could get in his neck, not able to get any closer. Colin didn’t mind. He got to feel her boobs squished against him, content to lose sleep for that.

They finished the night watching a rom com show to calm Olivia down and get her mind off the movie. At the end, they bid Vanessa and Johnathan goodnight, and snagged the baby monitor.

Colin waggled his eyebrows suggestively at Vanessa, causing her to blush deeply and hurry down the stairs to the guest house quickly. Johnathan followed closely behind.

Olivia and Colin brushed their teeth together before crawling in bed, and he chucked with amusement when she moved all the way to his side. She ended up sleeping almost under him and making him balance on the edge of the mattress. Colin tamped down the slight irritation, kissing her head as he silently moved to her other side. Settling in the middle of the bed, spreading out but keeping close.

He drifted off too, soon after he got comfortable.

***

Colin woke up around four in the morning, restless, and noticed the bed was empty and the door was open. Sitting up, he realized the bathroom was empty too. Olivia was not in there with him. Pulling on his sweatpants, he’d padded down the hallway, seeing the bedroom Vanessa and Allison usually slept in with the door open.

He walked in slowly, trying to be quiet, seeing Olivia curled around Allison fast asleep. Her lips were pressed against her temple, and her arm was thrown across the little girl’s body. They were snuggled deep in the covers, the glow of the night light illuminating their red hair faintly.

Colin smiled and backed out gently, closing the door. Crawling back into bed, he turned up the baby monitor to full volume before falling back to sleep.

***

The next morning, Olivia and Colin were downstairs with Allison, making a full non-pork breakfast. A cartoon playlist was playing over the surround system when Vanessa came through the side door, Johnathan shortly after. Looking a little worse for wear, and the both of them were walking funny. Which Colin thought was hilarious.

Colin was taking a sip of coffee, in his usual stance against the counter, playfully raising his eyebrows at them as they settled on the stools at the island.

“Good morning sunshines. Sleep well? At all?” Colin said over the rim of his coffee cup, holding back a chuckle by clearing his throat.

Vanessa moved gingerly, biting her lip as she carefully settled against the seat. He laughed to himself silently and kept the coffee cup to his lips as he sipped slowly. Truly terrified to lower it and embarrass the couple. He was hopeful he’d get a chance to really rib them one day soon without Allison present.

He noted Johnathan’s stiff movements and his eyes narrowed with irritation.

“Yo’, is my guesthouse okay? Anything broken?” Colin suddenly inquired, his eyebrow raising in concern for his possessions. Olivia looked over at him, amused.

“Man, I’ll just write you a check, ok? We don’t need to always talk about it,” Johnathan responded, accepting a cup of coffee from Colin wearily.

Jesus, Colin thought. What’d they do to my shit?

Colin turned his attention to Olivia, who was studiously making Allison”s plate at the stove. Her shoulders were hunched, and she was making little breathy sounds, trying not to laugh. He chewed the inside of his lip hard as she turned and hurriedly placed the plate on the counter in front of Allison, then swung back around to face the stove again.

A hilarious giggle escaped, and she slapped her hand over her mouth quickly. Her shoulders shuddered as she pulled down several more plates to sit next to the stove.

He couldn’t help but to let out a little chuckle at her antics, which caused her to burst out laughing. She squatted down and pressed both hands against her mouth, trying to stem her sounds. Her face was bright red, and tears were rolling down her face.

Colin held his coffee cup up to his mouth, and laughed properly now at the sight, causing her to give up and fall on her back, laughing hard. She grabbed her stomach and pulled her knees up to her chest, screaming with laughter and gasping for breath. He took a moment to drink in her pure joy.

Allison suddenly entered the equation.

“What’s wrong with Auntie Ollie, Momma?” she asked, ripping her gaze from her tablet and rising on the stool to look at Olivia. Who was still rolling around the kitchen floor laughing like she’d never laughed before.

“She’s a biatch,” Vanessa breathed quietly; Allison was no longer paying any attention to her. ”You”re freaking childish, Ollie.”

Colin let Olivia exhaust herself before bending down to grasp her hand and help pull her up.

“It’s hilarious though, isn’t it?” he said to her, still chuckling, taking another sip of his coffee.

Olivia nodded her head, unable to speak before swiping tears from her eyes. She took a deep breath and finished plating their food, ignoring Vanessa’s embarrassed scowl. “That’s what you get for making fun of me last night,” she whispered to her sister, sliding the plate to Vanessa and winking.

They ate breakfast together and discussed Thanksgiving plans. Vanessa suddenly looked at Colin in horror and shook her head at him slightly when Olivia announced happily that she was going to cook. He raised a questioning eyebrow at her.

She mentioned for him to look at his phone discreetly.

Seriously, what’s with them and these phones? he mused, pulling up his text and seeing she sent the message as an S.O.S. Which he got a real kick out of. He took a bite of eggs as he read it.

Colin do NOT let her cook. -Nessie

Smiling slightly around his bite of food, he replied.

Why not? It’s just turkey, basically a roasted chicken. What could go wrong? -C

Please, please just listen to me. Cater something and store it in one of your refrigerators downstairs. When she’s not looking, I’ll help you swap the whole meal out secretly. Just please listen to me. -Nessie

…come on, is this for real? Are you trying to get me killed? -C

No, it’s you who’s going to an early grave if you let this woman cook. Do not let her cook. Pay Mary a retainer or something for the holiday cooking. I’m so serious. Please don’t do this to us. -Nessie

I gotta give her a chance if she’s going to truly ever like me. -C

Like you? That ship sailed long ago, my friend. Cater. The. Fucking. Thanksgiving. Dinner. Bitch. -Nessie

You need your mouth washed out with some soap, Ma’am. Is ‘bitch’ your favorite cuss word or something? I’ll teach you how to curse in Spanish, it’ll sound prettier. My God. -C

Colin put the phone down and shot her an incredulous look. Johnathan roared with laughter, having read the text exchange the whole time over Vanessa’s shoulder. Colin’s eyes narrowed slightly as he began to really pay attention to their interaction.

Olivia, who had been talking to Vanessa and Johnathan about a new recipe she wanted to try this year, was oblivious to the secret exchange.

Johnathan was nodding at her intently, his usual humorous self-feigning ignorance. He politely asked Olivia questions about what she normally cooks for the holiday, because he needed everything to be “halal” of course. Vanessa chuckled under her breath and rolled her eyes. Doing a better job at hiding her laughter than her sister had.

Then Olivia said something absolutely atrocious that made Colin frown and Johnathan’s eyebrows raise on a slight head tilt, and he pulled up his text quickly again.

Hell no, we aren’t eating that. Send me the company you usually use. -C

Vanessa broke out in peals of laughter, stemming it quickly. She took a huge bite of food and glanced at Colin with humorously big eyes.

He leaned forward and kissed Olivia on the side of her head, giving her ass a firm pat.

Can’t be good at everything, he thought to himself, finishing his coffee.

***

The weekend went by in a blur.

Vanessa, Allison, and Johnathan left, and Olivia spent a few days at the home while he was off to work. She spent her free time swimming laps in the indoor pool, trying to strengthen her arm more.

She didn’t even complain when Colin added extra safety monitors, wanting to be able to check from his phone to make sure she didn’t injure herself and drown while he was at the office. She spent her days swimming laps, and then going upstairs and practicing making focaccia bread with Mary. Finding solace in decorating the bread, and the results were beautiful.

She surprised Colin one day when he’d come home from work with a gorgeous bread design, kissing him senseless when he came into the kitchen. Colin felt at peace for once in his life and found himself relaxing more. Enjoying Olivia”s company and the lack of anxiety that had been his ever-present companion since he was sixteen.

Colin disclosed to his therapist about how he felt settled and went through his days feeling almost like a new person.

Day by day Olivia found her initial anxiety over their arrangement easing, but also found that this new peace brought time to think. And when she had time for her thoughts, she thought about the past, how she got into working for Gypsy. About her parents. About Vanessa and Allison’s situation.

Giving up a grueling schedule for four years, she wasn’t used to having so much free time. She managed to find other ways to fill up her time before she met Colin. Now, she was struggling to find ways to occupy herself.

Olivia spent some time practicing dance moves, as she loved dancing. She took every opportunity to practice her moves before she’d got into the lifestyle. Thinking back, she smiled, remembering fondly how she used to teach a techniques class every once in a while at her and Aliyah’s friends’ studio. However, she could only teach about five times a year, lessons had become less and less frequent the more her arm bothered her.

Colin came home one day to her in the attic dusting. Another day to her having all his car doors open and detailing each one. She’d begun to fall asleep on top of her self-imposed architectural studies due to wearing herself out during the day. He wore her out further by making love to her most nights a week.

Though she orgasmed during these sessions he’d got the niggling feeling that something was wrong. He just couldn’t put his finger on it.

He spent his days wondering if it would break her emotionally for her to endure him forcing it out of her sexually. Though he knew she was strong, he’d gleamed in these weeks just how fragile her psyche was. Olivia had a delicate disposition. Would she forgive him if he took it that far?

One day, he came home, and Mary pulled him to the side in his study. The older woman looked at him with raised eyebrows.

“Mary, what’s wrong?” Colin asked, folding his arms and leaning his hips against his desk.

“Mijo, Olivia’s cleaning everything. I’ve caught her cleaning multiple bedrooms and their bathrooms this week, and today she was polishing the leather seats in the media room. Yesterday she was scrubbing the grout in the mudroom with a toothbrush! I don’t feel right accepting a paycheck if I’m not even able to do my job,” Mary said softly, placing her hand on his arm. “Something is bothering her, amor.”

He leaned against his desk, regarding the older woman who had been like a mom to him for the last ten years.

“Ma,” Colin said affectionately, giving her a grin. “You know I’d pay you even if all you did was come sit in the house. Come on,” he laughed before turning serious. “I’ll talk to her.”

“Mijo, you know I stay out of your business. But I’ve come to care very deeply for Olivia. I hope you aren’t doing anything that…affects her. Colin, women are sensitive creatures,” Mary pressed.

Colin smiled at her kindly. He knew exactly how sensitive Olivia was. Emotionally and otherwise.

“Thanks for the advice, Ma. I’ll handle it, ok? Don’t worry please, I’ll talk to her.”

“Okay Mijo, I can’t walk in on her cleaning anything else. I’ll scream,” she joked, giving him a wide smile and walking out of his study.

Colin followed shortly after, walking through the house until he found Olivia in the gym, walking on a stair master. He spent a minute watching her briefly through the glass door before walking in. Her head whipped to the side, her eyes widened before clocking his carefully placed expression.

“Hey beautiful. How long you been, on that thing?” he asked conversationally. He studied her, observing she was drenched in sweat. She threw him a little smile before she huffed out a breath.

“An hour, almost,” she said with difficulty.

Colin frowned.

“M’kay, Well then that’s more than enough. This is a stair master, not a treadmill,” Colin rebuked her sternly, tamping down his rising irritation.

Olivia huffed and bit her lip as he reached past her and punched the stop button, bringing the machine to a halt. She hopped off before bending into a deep stretch, stretching her quads and calves. He waited patiently until she was done.

“Olivia, what’s going on with you?” he asked, turning to prop himself against a weight machine.

“What do you mean?” she asked, taking a towel she had hanging on the machine, and wiping her face and neck. Her breasts were heaving, the sweat soaked material of her tank top clinged to her curves indecently.

Colin’s eyes flicked up to hers and narrowed.

“I mean exactly what I said. What’s going on with you? And I want an honest explanation as to why you’ve been breaking your body down doing unnecessary tasks. Like dusting the attic. Please don’t take offense to how I say this, but that’s not normal behavior Olivia,” he said, folding his arms.

Olivia snorted, turning to sit on one of the steps on the Stairmaster. ”And neither is being a billionaire. Yet, here we stand, together,” she said cheekily.

A muscle ticked in his jaw. She stared at him silently, challenging him.

”Kneel the fuck down at my feet right now. I see you”ve forgotten your place,” he said, his voice coming out sternly. He relished her startled look before she slowly got down on her knees before him.

“Sex between us is good, but something is off with us there, too. When we fuck, you orgasm but there’s something up there in that head of yours that’s preventing you from truly letting go with me. And I want an answer,” he bit out.

Olivia’s eyes widened.

“Do I not please you? I spread my legs for you every time you ask. I cum just like you want me to, I sound just like you want me to. I do every position you require,” she said, tilting her head to the side, her eyes roaming his face tightly. She leaned back onto her heels, propping her elbows behind her and shoving her breasts out lewdly.

Colin’s eyes stayed tight on hers, refusing to be distracted. Refusing to be manipulated. His hands went to his pants and unbuckled his belt before whipping it loose. He rolled it up in his hands. Her fingers clenched, barely but he noticed it. He spoke to her in a harsh elevated tone, betraying how close he was to snapping.

“I don’t care about those pretty words you just used to string a couple of manipulative sentences together. Sure, you spread your legs. Yes, you damn well cum each and every time because I’m good at working your body. And as far as positions, well…” his eyes scraped down her form, seeing her nipples harden through the material of her tank top. “Maybe you should work some Pilate’s into your cardio routine because I’ve been easy on you so far baby.”

Olivia looked away quickly, her lips tightening at his words. Colin continued.

“What doesn’t please me is your obstinance. Your blatant disrespect. Trying to make me feel like I don’t know what I’m sensing. One more time,” he gave her another chance.

Olivia’s eyes strayed on the belt in his hands. A look flashed across her face before it was gone as soon as it appeared.

“I miss being tired,” Olivia sighed rather wistfully; her eyes flickered up to him. She sat up straight onto her knees and huffed. Colin narrowed his eyes. “It’s the truth,” she said softly.

“Maybe. But your truth is missing something,” he countered.

“What?” she said, scrunching up her nose.

“Trust,” he said sternly. “I can’t give you what we need until I feel like you trust me.”

There was a pregnant pause.

“I will never tell you. That is something you can trust,” she stared at him in a blatant challenge, unmoving. Her eyebrow arched.

They stared at each other for a few heartbeats of time, their battle of wills vicious. Over it, she got up off her knees slowly, throwing down her towel before walking past him. Irritated with her lack of response, he grabbed her arm roughly, leaning into her ear.

She arched her neck away and growled low in her throat. He tightened his fingers and growled back, baring his teeth.

“Little girl, I could eat you up and spit you out for breakfast and keep going throughout my day like nothing happened. Do not mistake indulgence for weakness. I will take us there when I am ready and not a minute before. Do you understand me?”

Olivia tensed, her eyes slowly meeting his. Her breathing came out low, and labored. She stayed silent.

“I will not be manipulated; I will not be had. You need to learn to ask me for what you need. To trust me to give it to you,” he put a finger to her temple. “I have been exceedingly patient with you. But if you don’t figure this mental shit out soon, fuck a therapist,” Colin”s voice came out harsh.

Olivia”s neck craned back as he leaned forward into her face, his eyes flashed dangerously, and his nostrils flared slightly as he fought against every instinct inside of him telling him to lash out at her.

”I will reach inside your brain my damn self and yank it out, and I can almost guarantee you won’t like the method I use. That is a promise, mama. Now, I’m going to give you one. More. Chance,” they stared at each other for several heartbeats, their heavy breathing the only sound in the room.

He sucked in a sharp breath of air as she suddenly leaned forward an inch from his face, her eyes pierced his like a knife in his gut.

“I’d like to see you try. You’re not getting in anywhere I don’t want you,” she said, her green eyes going hard as she met his deadly stare with one of her own.

Colin dropped the belt, hearing it hit the gym floor. He moved lightning fast and grabbed her by the hair, snatching her to his front. Olivia’s face winced with pain, and she closed her eyes briefly before opening them, the green in her eyes turning dark and stormy.

He pushed her backwards, crowding her into the small two-person sauna he had in the corner of the gym, ignoring her pushing against him.

“Colin,I don’t want to be in here!” Olivia bit out angrily as he slammed the door behind them. The room began steaming up. He knew she didn’t like to be hot.

“You had better be glad we need this skin pretty for the gala in a few days because otherwise I’d fuck you up right now, little girl. What. Is. My. Name?” Colin growled down into her face. He pressed her into the wall with a hand against her breast, his body temperature rising.

“Sir! It’s sir!” Olivia gasped, pushing against his chest. She turned her head trying to evade him but he snatched her back to him by her hair. Their breaths sounded harshly between them as they fought against each other mentally. Each one vying for control of the other.

Colin”s mouth came down in a crushing blow onto hers and she retaliated, biting his lip hard enough to draw blood. He snarled, kissing her back just as hard. Their kiss was messy, their teeth clashed together as they both struggled to hurt the other. She moaned as he took her tongue between his teeth and bit painfully.

Colin stopped, feeling a key slid into a lock. He pulled away slowly, looking at her quizzically. She was panting, still struggling against his hold.

“Olivia,” he said, his brows furrowed. No way. We can’t be this lucky, he thought.

“Olivia, look at me,” he snapped. She stopped struggling and met his eyes. “Baby are you a masochist?” he whispered, his jaw ticking.

Her nose scrunched. “What?” she said, her features pinched tight, and her lip curled, she was seemingly offended.

“You heard me. Answer the question.”

“No. No. I can’t be. That doesn’t make sense, because…” she cut herself off, her eyes widening.

Colin tilted his head. “Because why?”

Olivia paused. “Because it doesn’t make sense,” she said slowly, almost like a question.

“Honey, I don’t think you want to work yourself to the bone to be tired, I think you like pain. I’ve been seeing the signs but not connecting the dots,” he mused. “You get wet when I spank you, when I give you pain it turns you on. Everything you do is challenging me to hurt you, and when I don’t, you get restless. I’ve been noticing, hell even MARY has been noticing something is off. Just now, the look in your eyes when you saw my belt, the way you’re violently kissing me. You like it.”

”No. I can’t be like those people,” Olivia whispered, her eyes looking far away for a second.

Colin furrowed his brows in confusion, tilting his head. “What do you mean, like what people?”

“People who get off on pain, that’s…not what nice people do. It’s a sickness,” she swallowed, her eyes flickering back and forth between his.

“Baby, it’s just a sexual kink. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person,” Colin said, his hand loosening in her hair. He caught the look of disappointment in her eyes before he tightened back up watching her nipples harden even more.

“But-“

“Why do you think this? Who have you been talking to that gave you this impression? What’s the reason as to why you feel this way?” he asked softly, instinctively knowing something happened that colored her perception of her sexual identity.

She shook her head against his hold. “I can’t tell you,” she said angrily. Olivia looked to the side, avoiding his stare.

Colin felt a fresh wave of heat wash over him as he bristled, irritated. He leaned a hand against the wall next to her head.

“Does it have to do with one of your side hustles?” he pressed.

Get the fucking hell out of here. I’m not telling you shit. Not a damn thing, Olivia muttered inside of her head. Seeing he wasn’t going to relent.

“Bunny,” she whispered.

Shocked, Colin let go of her immediately. They stared silently at each other.

“Whatever happened to make you feel this way, doesn’t make it any less true. I can make you love it, Olivia. This side of yourself you don’t want to see. I can give you what you need. I thought maybe you didn’t trust me, but now I’m seeing it’s you that you don’t trust. You need to trust yourself; you can lose yourself in me. I promise. I’ll take care of you. We can be so amazing,” he whispered.

Mi amor, he kept the endearment in. Colin bit his tongue, waiting for her to turn her eyes to him. Acknowledge what he’d just said to her. He stood patiently for a minute, seeing she wasn’t relenting. He pushed off the wall and folded his arms.

“Go,” he said curtly, dismissing her. He clenched his jaw, watching her shake her head and quietly walk out the door.

Colin sat on the bench and put his head in his hands. Wondering how he didn’t catch it earlier. A sadist’s best friend was a masochist. And the heavens just gave him one for free? A masochist who didn’t know she was a masochist. The heavens had a sense of humor indeed.

And how the hell was he supposed to navigate this with her if she refused to acknowledge it?