Chapter 32
Natalie
Life’s a real bitch, and one of her favorite pastimes is fucking you raw in the ass without even buying you dinner first. It’s impossible for me to take a step forward because that evil mistress is there to drag me thirty steps backwards, making it impossible to find happiness.
After the concert, life went back to normal.
Unfortunately, the dreadful PTA hasn't been dismantled, and Candace still has insufferable parents and a deadbeat ex-husband.
“Do you think you could show up on time, not reeking of cigarettes?” Betty asks immediately upon my arrival.
“Aw Betty! I’m thrilled your husband let you out of your cage today, must feel amazing getting to stretch your legs,” I throw at her, unfazed by her bullshit.
“Candace, are you hearing this? We can’t allow this. We’re the PTA.” She looks around the room for backup.
Instead of their usual passive-aggressive banter, Candace just shakes her head at Betty. “Okay, let's get started, ladies. Put aside your differences so we can discuss Mr. Robert's retirement party and begin planning the prom.”
She looks drained, heavy bags are under her pretty blue eyes, and she’s tapping her fingers on the table in a frenzy. We went a few days without seeing each other after the trip, and it was the hardest three days ever, giving her space to busy herself with the holidays.
We run through all the useless shit we do every week. What’s left in the budget, and who’s chaperoning prom. We’re far too prepared to be having weekly meetings. Most of it's stuff that gets repeated.
“Wait up,” I call to Candace as she hustles to her car. “Where are you going? I thought we could hang out for a little bit. I missed you.” I pull her close to me while making sure no one’s watching.
Taking a deep breath, a small tear drops down her cheek. “I missed you too. I’m so sorry. This week’s been awful. I had so much fun going away with you, but coming back was the biggest reality check,” she says with a shaky voice.
“What do you mean? What are you talking about?” I ask frantically. “The girls told Greg and his wife about you over Christmas, and he was less than impressed when he dropped them off. He disapproves and doesn’t think the girls should be around a mother who’s acting so irresponsibly.”
A violent scream makes its way up my throat, but I push it back down, fighting this urge to tear Greg in half.
“What is he talking about? Acting irresponsibly? Isn’t he the one who literally took off, and no longer wanted to be a father?
What gives him the right to judge you for dating now that you’re single? What a prick.”
“He was upset that the girls had spent so much time with you, and fears what an example it’s setting to them that a woman my age can have a much younger playmate, as he called it.
My parents, of course, backed him up once they found out and have been by every night to double-check you’re not there.
” We’re alone in the parking lot, but that doesn’t stop her from turning every few minutes to assure we’re alone. It’s a habit I’m growing tired of.
“What happens if I am there? What are they gonna do about it?” I’m defensive now and backed in a fucking corner. Remember what I said about life fucking you in the ass?
“It’s been a disaster. I’ve explained our relationship until I’m blue in the face, and I can’t do it anymore. Nobody’s listening to me. They’re intentionally misunderstanding my affection for you and tuning me out.” Her tears go from zero to a flood in three seconds.
“Baby, I’m so sorry. You don’t deserve this. Why do they get to be happy and you don’t? This is insanity. You’re not a teenager still living at home. How can they have any say over your life?”
Grabbing her waist, I pull her into me and die a little as she falls apart against me. “Let me come over tonight and have dinner with you guys. Things won't get back to normal until we do.”
I feel her head nod against my chest. There’s no time like the present to get your hopes up. I’m overly optimistic that we’ll be able to get our groove back one family dinner at a time.
Madison has the door open the second I ring the bell, and her bouncy twin comes sprinting down the stairs, screaming my name. It’s been too long since I’ve seen them, and man, I didn't realize how much space they take up in my black heart.
“Oh, my gosh, Nat, you’ll never guess what our stepmom got us for Christmas,” Kate shrieks, pushing her sister out of the way.
“No, Kate! We agreed I could show mine first, back off,” Madison snarls, and it’s an all-out girl fight in the foyer.
Kate’s got a monster grip on a black and red CD case with a familiar couple on it. “It’s the White Stripes. The one I asked for!” She’s beaming, showing me the inside details and lyrics to her favorite songs.
Madison pushes her sister out of the way to put the new Fall Out Boy CD in my hand, and although they’re not my favorite band, I'm happy to see we’re moving away from angry chick rock.
“Is it true you can’t come over anymore?” Madison asks in a distressed voice.
“Who said that?” Trying to keep my tone light is next to impossible when all I want to do right now is rage.
“Grandpa said you can’t come inside his house anymore.” Kate frowns, taking her CD back.
Before she can say anymore, Candace runs over, ushering them out of the room and shutting the door behind me. “Come inside. Why are you guys just standing at the door?”
“Why do they think I can’t come over anymore?” I ask, following her to the kitchen, hot on her trail as she avoids my question.
“Just something they overheard my dad saying. But remember, we’re not going to dwell on that, because you’re here now. Are you hungry?” She asks, with the perky Stepford voice she used when I first met her. It’s sending red alerts to my brain, but like a classic masochist, I ignore them.
“I’m not going to sweep that under the rug, Candace. Why does your dad think this is his house, and why the hell would I not be invited in? Does he think I’m a vampire here to drain everyone's blood?”
I can’t help but feel sorry for her when she rubs her temples, clearly stressed.
“This is my dad’s house. He helped us buy it when we were first married.
It’s technically in his name and Greg’s.
He’s also got a tight hold on the rest of my inheritance.
Court opted to take all of hers after high school, while I pushed mine out in phases. ”
“So what’s Daddy gonna do? Ground you if he sees me here? Take the car for the weekend?”
“You don’t understand, he could take away everything– the house, my money, it's all tied up in other people's names.” She fidgets with a kitchen towel, rolling and unrolling.
“You're right, I don't understand how you don’t have access to your own shit, Candace.” Moving around her, I raid her fridge hoping for something stronger than apple juice, but it’s all I’m left with.
“It was never an issue before you, and now suddenly I’ve got vultures watching my every move.”
Chugging the juice straight from the bottle like an immature child fills me with joy, hoping her dad’s spying through the window, seething. “Then just move out, get a new place for you guys to live the way you want, away from these assholes.”
“And where would you have us go? I need the money from my inheritance, and I love this house. I won’t leave it.” Her face is growing red and stern as she looks around at all the shit in her house holding her back from fully living.
“It’s just stuff. You can buy new stuff, a full fresh start.”
“Why would I want something else?” She sighs, looking everywhere but at me.
“You’re blindly playing house, and I can’t believe you’re not embarrassed.” I throw the empty bottle into the sink, and shut the fridge door before it starts beeping at me.
Apparently that was the straw that broke the camel's back and I knew dinner was over before it even started. She doesn’t even look at me when she tells me I should go and that she was done repeating herself.
The twins never came downstairs to object or say bye and there was no point in arguing with someone so fucking delusional.
How do we move on or have any kind of life if her entire world revolves around drapes and throw pillows?
“My dad has a few business partners coming into town for a conference. I volunteered to help with a few things, so let's take a minute and cool off. This was a long week. I’m fried and could use a second to think things through,” she says, bringing her attention back to me.
Leaving the house, I feel more skeptical than hopeful, but it’s a good thing I always have a plan up my sleeve. She can have all the space she wants. I won't even step inside the house.