Chapter 23
TWENTY-THREE
Bryson
“He doesn’t know yet?” Cullen asks.
I shake my head.
“Who doesn’t know what?” Pax asks as he plops himself down in a chair opposite me.
The guy hasn’t changed a bit. None of us have, really. Bit more facial hair. Shoulders a bit broader. But we’re still the same three guys we were when we played together in school.
“Tonksy doesn’t know that Bryson is the one boning his ex.”
Jesus Christ.
“I’m not boning his ex.”
Cullen raises a brow at me.
“I think you just might be, bro,” Pax says, his tone bored as he starts to channel surf.
“Don’t reduce her to being his ex. Her name is Sophia, and I’m going to fucking marry her one day, it’s not about boning her. But if he’s got a problem with me doing that, he’s sure as fuck not going to be happy about the rest of it.”
They exchange a look. One that only two brothers – or two guys raised as brothers – can understand when they look at each other.
“What?” I demand.
“Nothing, bro. Just never heard you talk so passionately about something before,” Cullen explains.
“Took me this long to finally get her, I’m not stupid enough to lose her now.”
“Didn’t know you had it in you, big guy,” Pax replies.
“If you’ve got it in you, I sure as hell have it in me.”
“Touche.”
“He had his chance with her anyway. I had nothing to do with him fucking that up, so he can kick off all he wants, but he knows this is his fault.”
“You know what? I think this is the most words I’ve ever heard you string together in a sentence,” Pax muses.
He’s probably right about that. Brooding silence was basically my trademark back then, it still is now for the most part, unless it’s just me and Sophia. She brings it out in me. When it’s just the two of us, it’s like every word I buried down deep all these years is fighting its way out to talk to her.
“Is she gonna tell him herself?” Cullen asks.
I shake my head. “Not without me there. Fuck that.”
“You tell him then.”
“If she wants me to, I will. I think she does, so it’s out in the open and he can adjust or whatever. But I don’t really give a fuck about letting him adjust, and I figure, while he doesn’t know, he’s not coming at her about it. May as well leave that as long as possible. That’s my logic.”
“It’s a small town, Bry, it’s not going to take him long to find out if he wants to know. I don’t know how the fuck he doesn’t know already,” Pax cautions me.
That’s the main thing I hate about this place. Every prick knows every other prick’s business. You can’t hide from fuck all around here. It probably is a miracle that he hasn’t caught on these past few months. It’s not like we’ve been hiding.
“I’m with Sophia. Just rip off the band aid, man. Get it done,” Cullen says around a mouthful of chips.
Maybe I will. “I’ll do whatever she wants me to do.”
And I’m not afraid to admit it. I’d do just about anything for that girl.
“What the fuck happened to us?” Pax sighs, but I can see the smirk on his lips. “We were these sexy bachelors, doing whatever the fuck we wanted, and now all three of us are pussy whipped to the eyeballs.”
“Don’t let Berlin hear you talking about being pussy whipped , you’ll get her all pissed off.”
“Your girlfriend being a bitch isn’t really my issue, Cull.”
“Your sister being a bitch is, though,” Cullen retorts.
These two and their weird fuckin’ sister, girlfriend, friend, brothers but not by blood dynamic is all kinds of fucked up. It’s borderline incestuous, while somehow managing to not cross any real boundaries. Sure as fuck pressed right up against them, though.
“I hardly ever get in trouble with Ice anymore,” Pax says proudly.
“Only because Lily keeps you in line,” I mutter.
Pax grins wide. “That girl sure is good for me.”
“Where are you two going when you finish study?”
“I dunno yet. It’ll be a while. I finish at the end of the year, but brains has ages to go. I think she’ll do her masters here, then maybe we’ll travel after that. I don’t know what the plan is, I just nod and smile and do whatever she wants.”
“Smart man,” Cullen says around another mouthful of chips.
It must be weird for them, with Cullen leaving soon. It’ll be the first time in their lives that they haven’t been living within an hour of one another.
“You gonna get a job next year then?”
He shakes his head. “Nah I think I’ll re-sign with the team for another two years, and work on my commissions in the off season. I’m not built for a nine to five.”
I can’t imagine him having the attention span to work office hours either. He’s like some kind of wild animal after a few hours of having to sit quietly. I swear the guy has undiagnosed ADHD or something.
I’ve seen some of the drawings he’s been working on lately, and he’s killing it. They’re seriously incredible.
“Do you reckon you could do a drawing of Aria for me to give Sophia for Christmas? A commission piece.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” I nod. “It’d be epic.”
“Fuck yeah, I’d love to. You send me the photo you want done, and I’ll make sure it’s ready in time.”
“Thanks, bro.”
“Just call me Santa Claus.”
“Save your weird kinks for the bedroom,” Cullen says as he throws the empty, balled up chip packet at him.
“If you think that’s a weird kink, you should hear about the time – ”
“I will literally pay you to not finish that sentence,” I interrupt him before we all hear something we can’t unhear.
He chuckles. “This feels like old times.”
He’s right. It does. I miss these boys when they’re gone. As much as it drives me insane, I miss the banter and the bullshit.
I’ll have to make more of an effort to visit, or call, or even text.
I’ve shut people out for most of my life, these two guys are some of the very few I let in, but even then, it’s been at arm’s length. Opening up to Sophia, and finally letting someone in completely, has changed me. It’s made me want to be more open.
Cull and Pax are two of the most loyal fuckers I’ve ever met. They’ll be my boys for life. Maybe one day, I’ll even tell them everything I’ve been through, but for today, I think I’ll settle for the banter and bullshit.
“I can wait in the car if you want to be able to say goodbye to her in private,” Sophia offers.
“If I’m going in there for the big dramatic send off, then so are you. We can look at the sky with tears in our eyes as the plane takes off.”
She bites back a laugh. “ Sounds perfect.”
“Come on, chicken, out you get,” I tell Aria as I open her door and lift her out of her car seat.
She grins up at me, with blue sharpie all over her face. Neither of us knew she had a pen in the back, and apparently Carley and Brent thought it was too hilarious to snitch on her, so now she looks like she’s tried to come along as a Smurf.
“Oh my god, she even got it on her eyelids,” Sophia groans as she comes to see her daughter’s handiwork.
“Mumma, Ari draw.”
“Yes I can see that, honey. You have pen all over your face.”
“Pen blue, Mumma, Ari draw.”
“That is a blue pen, good job,” Sophia tells her, always the picture of patience. “Maybe next time you could have a crack with washable marker.”
“We’re going to have a hell of a time scrubbing that off,” I tell Sophia. “She drew on the fridge door with that pen the other week and it took me about an hour to get rid of it.”
Carley and Brent are smothering their laughter as they unload their suitcases from the back of the truck.
“You two won’t think it’s so funny when I let her give you both a parting tattoo,” I threaten them.
“Ari draw awunty Carwe?”
I chuckle. “Yeah, Carwe , Aria wants to know if she can draw on you.”
Carley shakes her head in amusement. “Maybe next time Ari-bug. I have to go on a big airplane and I don’t want the staff to look at me funny.”
“Big air plane,” Aria repeats.
“You take my bags, give me the kid,” Carley demands, shoving her suitcase in my direction and basically snatching Aria from my arms.
Aria claps gleefully at being in my sister’s arms.
Even I was shocked at how wholeheartedly Carley has embraced being ‘Aunty Carley’. She adores Aria, and the feeling is entirely mutual. Aria asks after Carley all the time now. I think she’ll miss her more than I will.
We all walk towards the airport together, Carley and Aria up front with Brent, and Sophia and I behind them. I swing my arm around her shoulders and kiss the top of her head.
“You alright?” she asks me softly.
I nod. It’s a bittersweet moment.
I’ve been waiting years for Carley to finally leave the nest, but now that day is here, I feel sad too. I never thought she’d be going so far away, but I’m happy for her. And the more space between her and our parents, the better.
The only way this could have a better outcome is if they were leaving and she was staying. But I want her to go and experience the world. She deserves to do everything she wants to do, and see everything she wants to see. I just want her to be happy.
Watching her with Brent, and the looks they keep exchanging, I know she is happy. I don’t know if they’ll last in the long run, but if they do, I approve. He’s a good guy. He takes good care of her.
We walk through the large doors of the international terminal, and Carley and Brent head for the check-in counter.
Aria comes running back to us when she gets sick of standing in line and starts pointing at everything and asking Sophia what it all is.
I’ve never really had much to do with toddlers, but I love nearly every minute of my life with Aria in it. She’s such a sweet little kid. She has her moments of madness and acting out, but all in all, she’s a great kid. I could answer her questions all day and not grow tired of it.
“You’re getting so heavy,” Sophia tells Aria.
I hold my arms out to take her, and Aria clambers over willingly.
“Thanks,” Sophia says gratefully as she shakes out her arms.
Aria has grown so much, but she’s still a tiny little thing. Something she inherited from her mother.
They get all checked in and we head for the lounge that’s located before they head off into customs, and we have to say our goodbyes.
I’m busy talking to Aria, so when I hear “Daddy!” I don’t even recognise it’s in my sister’s voice .
Sophia jabs me lightly in the ribs, and I look up just in time to see Carley hugging our father.
Fuck .
Other than some lunatic with a bomb strapped to himself my dad is the last person I want to see in an airport.
Sophia steps closer to me as we stop, and winds her arm around mine, silently supporting me.
I could keep walking, and pay no mind to the prick who’s biologically my parent, but I don’t want to make a scene for Carley. She’s already shed a few tears earlier due to our mother and her refusal to accept her choices, I don’t need her getting upset about mine and my father’s strained relationship.
I watch as she kisses him on the cheek and he beams down at her.
He’s so fucking fake.
It looks as though she’s his pride and joy, but I don’t believe a second of his act.
“I can’t believe you came.”
“I had to be here so I could say goodbye to you.”
I don’t even believe that. I doubt he even realised that today was the day they were leaving. Us coming across him right now is nothing more than luck, and nothing will convince me otherwise.
I glance at Brent, and see that his expression looks how I feel. Like he can’t stand the cunt in front of him.
Looks like Brent just went up another ten points in my book .
“Bry, Dad’s here!”
I nod my head. “Yeah, I see that.”
My father looks over Carley to me, then his gaze travels curiously down to the child in my arms and then to the woman glued to my side.
He looks genuinely confused.
I don’t know why he’d be confused. We haven’t spoken a word to one another in years. He has no idea about my life, or the people in it. For all he knows, Aria could be mine.
“Nice to see you, son.”
I wish I could say the fucking same.
“Dad.” I nod my head at him and see Carley roll her eyes in my peripheral vision. She hates when I great people like that, but this time, it really is all I can muster.
“And who do we have here?”
He takes a step towards me and my girls, and it takes all of my restraint to stay where I am, and not turn and go back to the car and drive far away from here.
“Hello,” he says to Aria.
She’s a smart girl, she turns her head and hides her face in my neck.
“This is my girlfriend Sophia, and this is Aria.”
“Hello, Sophia,” he says warmly – fake again – and offers her his hand.
She’s a solid actress, I’ll give her that. She takes his hand without hesitation and even manages to smile and tell him that it’s good to finally meet him.
“Is she yours?” he questions me, his head tipping towards Aria.
I don’t know how to answer that. She’s mine in all the ways that matter to me. We might not share DNA, but we share loving her mother, and I’ll be here for her for the rest of her life.
“Not biologically,” I finally settle on. “She’s Sophia’s daughter, so she’s mine now too.”
Aria peeks out at him.
“She’s a beauty.”
I nod firmly.
“I guess that kind of makes me a grandpa.”
Sophia must feel the way my body tenses at that.
“Oh my gosh, is that the time? We better get you guys upstairs and say our goodbyes, Bryson has to be back for a meeting in an hour.”
I don’t have a meeting in an hour. I don’t have a single meeting at all today, but if it means I get to get the hell away from him, then I’ll pretend to have a hundred meetings on the schedule.
Dad is still looking at Aria, trying to get her attention and make her smile. It’s incredibly satisfying that it isn’t working.
“We better go,” I say robotically, stepping around him and dragging Sophia with me.
I keep walking then, not even tempted to look back.
He won’t follow. His driver will be waiting.
“Are you okay?” Sophia asks me quietly .
“I’m alright.” I lean down and kiss her head as we walk through the crowds of people, all of whom are about to be off on some adventure.
“Did you know he was going to be here?”
“I think it was a fluke. He had a suitcase with him, he must have just got off a flight. But at least Carley can leave believing that at least one of her parents gave a shit.”
I’m not sure she truly does believe it, but what she convinces herself of is a totally different story.
“That’s really sad.” She looks up at me with moisture pooling in the corners of her eyes.
My sweet girl, she’s got such a kind heart. Even after everything she’s been through, she still hopes for the best from people.
“At least she’s getting out of here. That’s the main thing. Out of this town and far away from them.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t like to be mean about people I don’t know, but I don’t like your father very much.”
I chuckle. “That was the most polite way to say you hate him.”
She scrunches up her nose. “Sorry.”
“Stop saying sorry.” I laugh. “Let’s go and get these two on a plane then get me home for that meeting, aye?”