Chapter thirty-eight
Ilaid my head in my new chambers that night, as Aris promised.
The yellow bedspread caught my eyes, and then the white daisies that filled every shelf.
My fingers grazed the beautiful dresses hanging behind the room divider.
The fire in the hearth brightened the space, and I felt a sense of peace.
I exhaled a deep sigh.
Walking past the bed, I stood near the window that peered out into the darkness of the night sky.
There was a bench with some cushions below me, a perfect seating area to read a book on a rainy day.
To the right of me, my eyes took in the potted herbs.
My breath caught in my throat and I walked over, my steps echoing in the room. My fingers brushed over one of the plants. This was the exact plant I was intrigued by in the river that day Aris found me bathing. I held back a sob. That had to be a coincidence. But it wasn’t. Nothing was a coincidence when it came to him.
I cleaned myself in the bathing chamber to the far left, and the entire time I kept shaking my head.
This was all surreal.
What did this all mean from him?
After I washed myself, I pulled my nightgown over my body and crawled under the soft covers and nearly whimpered.
This was too perfect.
Too soft.
Too…alone.
Sleep knocked in the doorway of my mind, but my mind refused to answer and welcome it.
I rubbed the inner corners of my sleepy eyes.
Before I could stop myself, I walked to Aris’ chamber yet again in my nightgown.
It was past midnight.
He was going to laugh at me.
I knew he would. This was supposed to be my first night in my new chambers, and he was going to laugh at me. I didn’t want to be alone. I wanted to be with him.
Live fully, I reminded myself.
I was about to tap on his wooden doors before they disappeared before me and opened.
Aris had a large grin on his face.
My jaw dropped. “How—”
“I heard you.”
He smirked.
He was shirtless again with low-riding short trousers on his hips.
Dangerously low.
“No, you knew.”
“Maybe.”
He shrugged nonchalantly, and I wanted to shove him but pull him close to me at the same time.
“Come here.”
I stepped into his warm embrace.
I could never get used to this feeling that surrounded me every time he wrapped his arms around me.
It felt safe.
It felt right, as if I were meant to be here with him.
We didn’t say a word as we lay in his large plush bed, entwined in each other’s bodies, my head in that perfect spot beneath his shoulder, and fell into a deep slumber.
The next morning, Aris convinced me to stay in his bed instead of mine.
I smiled every time he came back from his study just to assure himself of my presence.
After tidying his chambers, I lounged in his space and caressed my freedom papers.
I couldn’t believe I was a free woman.
Though I was coming to terms with my brother’s death, I was beginning to feel different with Aris.
I knew from listening to other experiences and stories the way I felt about Aris wasn’t anything like theirs.
The feelings I felt for Aris were stronger and deeper—so much deeper than what others had described.
It ran into my very core, into the cells of my being. It wove through my soul’s existence and sang a song of union whenever he was near me.
Some moments, I felt as if I were dreaming, or floating by a memory in the distance and it would all disappear soon.
I held on as tightly as I could, fearing it might all be swept away.
I couldn’t let this go, whatever we were.
Aris barged in for the fourth time today with a smile across his face.
He held a few papers in one hand and in the other a package wrapped in brown paper.
“I brought you something.”
My heart leaped, wondering what else it could be.
He placed his papers on the table near his back window and approached me as he handed me the package.
I opened it with excited hands, allowing the brown paper to slip to the floor, and held the most beautiful green lace dress I’d ever seen.
“Aris,”
I said softly in astonishment.
I held it up, straightening the dress so I could admire its entirety.
I had no words.
No one had ever given me anything so delicate and beautiful as this.
The dresses he placed in my chambers were remarkable, but this dress was priceless.
My eyes stung. The light green lace covered the dark green silk layers of the skirt. It was pure perfection. I lifted my eyes to meet his, so open and clear, curious as to what I thought of it.
“Aris, this gift.
It’s—it’s exquisite.
I don’t understand.
Why are you—”
The double doors in his chambers opened, and in came a guard and Aris’ mother.
Her face dropped in hesitation when she saw me, eyes wide with wonder.
She stopped in the middle of the room, her crimson dress flowing against the floor.
Straightening my spine, I dropped my gaze, allowing my hair to hide a part of my face. I was in my short night dress in the emperor’s room, holding an expensive dress as if I were his whore.
How awkward.
“Who is this?”
Her voice was smooth and milky.
“Mother, this is my… She’s the healer’s assistant,”
Aris said carefully.
Acantha’s brows knitted.
“Are you ill?”
“Uh, no—no, I’m perfectly fine.
Thank you for asking.”
Acantha tilted her head, observing me.
Oh, she knows.
She had the same look Aris did whenever he saw something between the lines.
“I am to leave in two days.
Will I see you before my departure?”
He walked past me.
“As you wish.
Have you considered my offer?”
There was a moment between the two of them that spoke a thousand words.
“Darling…you know I can’t.
Let us speak of it no more.
I wouldn’t want to spoil the last days I have with you before returning to your father.”
“He isn’t my father.”
He shrugged.
“One day you’ll see he isn’t much of a husband to you, either.”
“Aris…enough of this,”
Acantha scolded.
She whirled towards the doors, giving him a look and me a smile before departing.
Aris’ shoulders dropped slightly, and he turned to face me.
“I have some meetings to attend, but when I come back, I want to see this dress on you, or I’ll put it on you myself.”
My toes slightly curled, and my cheeks flushed pink, imagining him doing so.
“Tempting.”
He gently placed his hand on my cheek, brushing his thumb over my lip.
“I’ll be back.”