Chapter 9
Once again, Alaska woke up alone in bed, though as she stretched, she felt amazingly refreshed.
It was surprising how well she’d been able to rest, all things considered, but also a relief.
And for the first time, she was excited to see more of The Refuge.
She was still coming to terms with everything that had happened, but now… she wanted to explore a bit.
Sitting up, she saw the lopsided cross-stitch she’d done for Drake on the wall and shook her head. She still couldn’t believe he had that thing, or how much it apparently meant to him.
She headed out of the bedroom and saw Drake sitting on his back deck with Mutt. He was absently scratching the dog’s head as he stared off into the woods. His other hand held a mug of coffee.
Alaska ducked into the bathroom and wrinkled her nose at her reflection. She was still looking rough. Her hair was a mess, her cheeks paler than normal, and she didn’t have to look under her clothes to see the bruises she could still feel on her body.
But she’d been lucky. Very lucky. And it was time to start living again…one baby step at a time. The thought of moving to an apartment by herself was scary as hell, but for today, she could explore The Refuge with Drake at her side.
Wishing she had some clothes that fit, Alaska headed out of the bathroom after using the toilet and brushing her teeth and hair. She made a detour to the kitchen to pour herself a mug of coffee before heading toward the deck.
Drake must’ve heard her coming, because he turned and smiled at her before she’d even opened the door.
“Morning,” he said easily.
“Good morning,” she returned, then took a seat in what she kind of considered “her” chair.
They didn’t speak for a long moment as Alaska took in the land around her.
The air was chilly, and when she shivered, Drake stood and went inside the cabin.
He returned a moment later with a fluffy throw blanket.
He placed it over her lap, gave her another small smile, then sat back down and picked up his coffee.
“Thanks.”
“Welcome.”
“You aren’t cold?” she asked.
“Nope.”
Another comfortable silence fell between them.
Then Drake said, “Tiny stopped by this morning with some clothes for you. They’re on the couch inside.
He wasn’t sure what size you were, so he got some leggings with elastic waists and a couple different-size T-shirts.
We need to get you some boots that fit, but in the meantime, he grabbed some slip-on sandals. ”
Alaska swallowed hard at the emotion that threatened to overwhelm her.
It was an incredibly considerate gesture.
She’d come here with nothing but the clothes on her back…
and she never wanted to see those again.
She didn’t mind wearing Drake’s sweats, but the thought of wearing something that might fit was appealing for sure.
She didn’t even know Drake’s friends, and yet they’d treated her better than the so-called friends she’d made over the years.
They finished their coffee then she headed back inside to get ready to head over to the lodge for breakfast. The leggings fit perfectly, and she chose the pink T-shirt that said Los Alamos in big block letters. The flip-flops were a little big but she didn’t mind.
As they walked over to the large building in the middle of the resort, Drake said, “All twelve cabins are currently occupied at the moment. Not everyone comes to breakfast, but it’ll probably be pretty full.
We can eat inside at the large dining table, or in the sitting area, or even outside if you prefer.
We try to give guests a variety of choices as far as eating goes.
Some aren’t comfortable around strangers, others need a wall at their back, and still others are somewhat claustrophobic and prefer to eat outdoors.
When it’s really cold, we’ve got propane heaters so they don’t freeze to death while they’re eating. ”
Alaska had read up on The Refuge, but she hadn’t realized how many small details Drake and his friends had to focus on, due to their clients’ needs. Most business owners didn’t have to think about providing so many different options when it came to something as simple as eating.
“We’ll play this by ear,” he told her.
She frowned. “Play what by ear?”
“Where you want to eat.”
She wanted to insist she was fine. That eating wasn’t a big deal, even after what she went through. He must’ve seen the impending protest on her face, because he continued.
“Al, you pretty much haven’t been around anyone but me since you were rescued.
There’s no telling what might trigger your residual fears.
Maybe nothing will, and that would be great.
But if something does upset you, don’t be embarrassed about it.
Every single person here, and most of the animals as well, are dealing with the consequences of whatever shit life has thrown their way.
You just have to figure out how to deal with your specific demons and go from there. ”
Alaska didn’t like that. Not at all. She’d always prided herself on her independence.
Was proud of the fact she’d lived overseas alone.
That she’d seen more of the world than most people ever would.
But now she wondered if that independence was part of her past. If she’d end up a scared and lonely old woman who was afraid to step outside her apartment.
“Shit. Now you’re thinking too hard,” Drake muttered. He stopped and put his hand on her forearm. “All I’m saying is to go with the flow. If you get in there and anything makes you uneasy, we’ll deal with it. Okay?”
“My shit isn’t your shit,” she said.
“What?”
“I just…I think I’ll be fine after a few days, but the last thing I want is you having to worry about what’s in my head, on top of what’s in yours.”
Instead of getting upset, Drake grinned.
“Why are you smiling?” she asked.
“You know, I’ve been on the receiving end of your lectures in the past. Over the phone.
In emails. You always fuss about me. Tell me I’m working too hard.
Worrying that I don’t take enough vacations.
But I’ve never gotten to see that wrinkle in your brow while you’re scolding me.
” He reached out a finger and gently brushed over the frown mark between her eyes.
Sparks shot down her entire body, straight to her toes, from the simple touch.
“It’s cute,” Drake informed her with a wink, before reaching for her hand, wrapping his fingers around hers, then continuing their trek toward the lodge.
“Seriously, Drake—” Alaska started to say, but he interrupted.
“You can tell me not to worry about you until you’re blue in the face, but it’s not going to make a lick of difference. You’re literally my oldest friend…there’s no way I’m not going to watch out for you.”
Ouch. She’d just been friend-zoned. That sucked.
Big time. But she supposed being Drake’s friend was better than the alternative.
Besides, while she’d crushed on him from afar since she was fourteen, it wasn’t as if being around her for a day or two would suddenly make Drake see the light, so to speak, and fall at her feet to declare his love.
She didn’t get a chance to respond because they’d arrived at the lodge. He opened the door for her and she walked inside, mourning the loss of his hand around hers. But she told herself not to get used to that kind of thing.
Looking around, she was once more super impressed with everything that Drake and his friends had built.
They entered into the massive open room of the lodge.
There was a huge fireplace on one side, with comfortable-looking leather couches and chairs placed around it.
There were bright rugs on the hardwood floors and the exposed rafters made the room look even bigger than it already was.
The smells coming from the kitchen made her stomach growl.
Drake smiled when he heard it, and took her elbow in his hand and urged her to the left, toward a dining area.
There was a large table, big enough to fit at least sixteen people, and a smaller one that had four chairs around it.
Nearby was a long rolling buffet table, filled to the brim with breakfast food.
She could see the outdoor eating area Drake had told her about through the windows. There were several picnic tables with umbrellas and a few propane heaters scattered around the patio. A door from the dining room gave guests easy access to the additional eating space.
There were half a dozen strangers sitting at the large table, eating breakfast and talking in low voices. When she and Drake arrived, they all glanced over and greeted them warmly.
Alaska smiled back…but it wasn’t until Drake stepped closer and wrapped his arm around her waist that she realized she’d stopped moving.
“You’re okay, honey. Just breathe.”
She let out the breath she’d apparently been holding with a whoosh. She tried to figure out what it was about the casual scene that had gotten to her.
“All right, I’m thinking we’ll sit over at the smaller table. Come on,” Drake said, urging her to walk around the guests to the four-seater table.
She vaguely worried about the others thinking she was rude, but couldn’t seem to muster the mental fortitude to force herself to sit and interact with them.
Drake pulled out a chair and she sat automatically. He pulled over another chair so close to hers, their thighs were touching. “Look at me, Al.”
She turned her head. As soon as she focused on his familiar blue eyes, she relaxed a fraction.
“Are there too many people in here?” he asked.
“No,” she said immediately.
“Is it that you don’t know them?”
Alaska shook her head.
Drake studied her for a long moment before asking, “Then what do you think is bothering you?”