Chapter 53
Chapter Fifty-Three
Hadley
When Easton returns from his away series, he has one day off before his home series starts, then he’s back on the road for a week.
“I never realized how grueling a season of baseball is. I should’ve been a football player. At most you play twenty-one games.” He brings over the avocado for Tanner on his tray.
“Then you’d be bruised up all the time,” I say, scrolling through my phone.
“Did you see the bruise on my thigh?”
“I kissed it, didn’t I?” I smirk at the screen.
“So if I was a football player, you’d have more boo-boos to kiss.” I glance up, and he winks at me. “Seriously, I’m gone all the damn time.”
“I guess you didn’t realize it until you had people to come home to.” I flutter my lashes.
He bends over and kisses me, making Tanner squeal.
That’s Tanner’s new thing, and I swear I think Easton taught it to him just to have an excuse to kiss me. Not that I’m complaining.
“My favorite days are my off days now.” He goes back into the kitchen.
I think right now might be the perfect time to tell him that Tanner called me mama, but I don’t want Easton to think I’m expecting him to put me in that role.
“Honor asked me something the other day.”
“Yeah?”
I wonder if he really even heard me because he’s busy cutting up a grilled cheese sandwich into the tiniest of squares for Tanner. I understand his obsessiveness, though. I’m afraid every time I feed him that he’s going to choke.
“She asked about the search for Tanner’s mom.”
“Okay…”
“Are you still not going to look for her?” I reach forward to help Tanner pick up a piece of avocado and put it in his mouth. It’s a new food for him, and he’s enjoying playing with it more than actually eating it.
He pushes away my hand. “Mama.”
This I should have expected. Here I am tiptoeing up to telling Easton, and the little man just outed me.
Easton says nothing, but when I peek at him in the kitchen, he’s staring at me instead of cutting the sandwich.
“So… I didn’t tell you.” I sit back in my chair. “Actually, can you come here?”
I don’t want to have this conversation with him across the room. It’s too important.
He brings the plate and the grilled cheese over to the table before sitting on the other side of Tanner. “I know,” he says as soon as he sits. “I heard it on the monitor, and I didn’t want to tell you or freak you out. I didn’t know how you felt about it and you didn’t tell me, so…”
I laugh because this is so us. I really hope one day we can actually stop putting up our guards.
“I was shocked. Though honestly, I don’t know why. He’s probably like, ‘This woman who’s around me all the time, you must be my mama.’”
Easton squints. “I’m not sure that’s it.”
“He just thinks he should have one. Every show has one. Every book has one. Every one of his friends has one.”
“When did Tanner get friends?” He places a piece of the grilled cheese on Tanner’s tray.
“You know what I mean. Hazel is always with her mom, for one.”
He puts up his hands. “I think the real question is how do you feel about it?”
My eyes widen. “How do I feel about it? How do you feel about it?”
Easton hooks his foot under my chair and slides it toward him. He pushes away the plate, invades my space, and whispers, “I fucking loved it.” Then he leans back, giving Tanner another piece of grilled cheese. “I’d love for you to be Tanner’s mom, but I’m not gonna put that pressure on you.”
Of course he isn’t. He’s probably afraid I’ll bolt. The old me would have.
I press my lips together. “It doesn’t really scare me. Isn’t that weird?”
“Well, I made a pretty kickass kid.”
I tilt my head. “I don’t want to take this lightly. I know we’re married on paper, and we’ve started this whole relationship to see where it goes. And it’s going great. I’m really happy.”
He waves, grinning. “Keep going.”
“I guess what I’m saying is that regardless of what happens with us, I’m in Tanner’s life for as long as he allows me.”
“Lucky him. What do I have to do to get the same assurance?”
I straddle him, running my nails through the hair at the back of his head.
“I want to keep you too. But I just want you to know, this means something to me. I thought about it the last three days, and I can’t control who Tanner views me as.
And I love it every time he says it, but just so you know, if you ever want out or anything like that, and worry about Tanner being collateral damage, he won’t be. ”
His hands fall down to my ass, and he pushes me closer to him. “I’d never expect any different. But does that mean you’re staying?”
I give him a firm nod. “I’m staying.”
“What are our chances we get him to go down for a second nap?” He looks over my shoulder, and I turn to look at Tanner staring right at us.
“Slim.”
Easton hooks his foot under Tanner’s high chair and wheels it over. “Who is this?” He points at me.
Tanner’s busy eating the avocado, but Easton won’t let it go. By the third time Easton asks, Tanner finally says, “Mama.”
“And who this is?” I point at Easton.
“Dada.”
“And you?” Easton asks.
Tanner stares at him blankly.
“I don’t think we’re there yet.” I chuckle.
Easton pokes his stomach. “You’re ours.”
“Yeah, he is,” I say softly.
My phone vibrates on the table, and I give Easton a kiss and then Tanner one before grabbing it and seeing a text from my mom.
I know you’re busy, and I would hate for you to miss it.
Here’s a link to the funeral information for Honor’s grandma.
Yes, I know.
I grunt and toss my phone on the table.
“Who’s that?” Easton frowns.
“My mom.” My forehead falls onto his shoulder, and he runs his hand down my back. “I think she’s going to Honor’s grandma’s funeral tomorrow too.”
“Well, makes sense since Honor was your best friend.”
I draw back, but his hand continues to run up and down my back. I love the way he’s always touching me when we’re close.
“It’s the way she delivers information, like, ‘Hey, Hadley, I know you don’t have your shit together, so just in case you didn’t know, her grandma died.’”
He leans in and kisses my forehead.
“Just as things are going good. We’re good, Tanner is good, and we actually made a profit at the bookstore last month.
The little teases of live storytellings on social media are helping.
More kids are showing up with their moms. It’s promising, but of course my mom has this way to just make me feel less than.
This is just her damage from a text, imagine tomorrow in person. ”
He kisses me again. “I wish I was going with you.”
“You have a game tomorrow. Besides, you need to get more boo-boos for me to kiss.” I place a quick kiss on his lips and move to stand, but he tightens his arms around me, not letting me.
“Another.” I kiss him, and Tanner squeals. When I go to move, he doesn’t set me free. “Another.”
“East.” I hook my hand around the back of his neck and kiss him hard enough to steal whatever smart remark he had waiting. When we finally separate, I’m still close enough to feel the heat of him. “Happy?”
“In front of our son? Jeez, do you have no self-control?”
I slap his shoulder and get up. This time he lets me, laughing the entire time.
“Mommy can’t get enough of Daddy,” he tells Tanner.
“Man, you get the green light, and you go from zero to sixty.” I shake my head at him.
“Don’t pretend you don’t know the man you married.”
I stand in the kitchen and watch him leisurely give Tanner little pieces of sandwich.
For a man who was so closed off to commitment, Easton sure knows how to love freely.
Isn’t that the problem with both of us? We both jump into things without thinking about the consequences until they hit us right in the face.