9
I rolled over in my bed to stare at the empty space next to me. The memory of waking up next to Mal the other morning sat in the forefront of my mind, and a sad smile slipped across my mouth. Her refreshing lemon scent still lightly clung to the vacant pillow, and I sighed with irritation at the longing I felt for her.
It had been two months since she had first fallen into my bed. Well, my guest bed. Two months of this secret relationship. I had hoped that inviting her into my private space and allowing her to sleep at my side, would have broken down that wall she was continuing to hold up. It became clear that it hadn’t worked when she had called me ‘boss’ so quickly after waking, drawing that clear line that we always used to keep business and pleasure separate.
My desire for her over time had become more than just a physical thing. How could it not? She was everything a man like me could ever want. Smart, funny, confident, sexy as sin, and feisty, so fucking feisty. I wanted to make her mine. I could give her everything that she could ever want. I could protect her too, she thought she didn’t need me for that, but one day she would. She would always be safe with me though.
I threw back the covers and headed to the bathroom to take a shower, hoping that by the time I was dry and dressed, I would have at least three ideas about how to get what I wanted.
Recently, I had been letting her get away with far more than anyone else could ever have, and I was finding my feelings for her grow even more whenever she challenged me. I had thought that the special treatment may have opened her eyes to see that what we were doing meant more to me. If she could see it, she was choosing to ignore it. And if she was choosing to ignore it, then I would have to stop letting her step that far out of line. I wasn’t stupid enough to leave myself open to be ripped down and made a fool of.
I was the leader of The Brotherhood, I had to draw a line somewhere.
I found myself, for the first time ever, with no idea what I might do. She wouldn’t be won over with flowers and chocolate, nor with fancy trips or expensive jewellery. No matter how badly I wanted to spoil her. She was the type of girl who fell for simple gestures, that was clear. But aside from inviting her into the sanctuary of my bed, I was all out of ideas. I thought back to last night, the way I had held her after fucking her on top of the bar at The Crown, and she had let me. I had thought that she was going to cave with the way she had softened in my arms and had relaxed more than I had ever seen her relax before. But she didn’t.
Instead, she got up, and she called me boss.
I’d never let her see it, but that had hurt.
I had never wanted a woman whose affection I couldn’t buy. Selene had been so easy to win over. Mal was not. Anger was building inside of me at my inability to work out what to do. It was not a good start to my day.
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A knock on my office door drew my attention away from the screen before me.
“Come in,” I called, and glanced at my watch. “You’re late.” I scolded my second as he sat opposite me and slung his jacket over the empty chair next to him. Grey always wore denim and leather, just as I always wore suits. I was finding that his appearance irritated me more often these days. Did he have to look like such a thug?
“Sorry, boss. Deb’s parents are in town.” He rolled his eyes in tired frustration.
“If I tell you eight p.m, I expect you here at eight p.m, Grey. I don’t give a fuck who’s in town,” I snapped.
I had come no closer to finding a way to win over Mal yet, and my mood had been a rollercoaster all day. Between business calls and check-ins with the members of The Brotherhood, I had spent my day thinking about her. Fantasising about our recent encounters, alternating between touching myself as I played the sound of her screaming my name on repeat in my mind, and coming up with over-the-top gestures that would probably just piss her off. My thumb had hovered over her number in my phone countless times too, but I couldn’t even seem to come up with an excuse to interrupt her day.
“Boss.” Grey’s voice was quiet and low. “What’s going on?”
“The same as every other day, Grey. I have some shit that I need you to handle,” I ground out, annoyed at the question.
“Sorry boss, it's just…” He hesitated for a second. “I feel like there is more on your mind.”
“Of course there is, but it’s none of your fucking concern.”
“It’s her, isn’t it?” he murmured. A look of frustration sitting on his heavily scarred face.
“You’re getting dangerously close to forgetting your place,” I warned, hoping that he was smart enough to keep his mouth shut. Although, if he didn’t it would give me an easy outlet for a little of my anger.
“And you’re getting dangerously close to fucking everything up over some girl,” he countered.
“Watch your mouth,” I snarled, rising from my seat.
He mirrored my action, and I leaned over the desk.
“Boss, I can’t sit back and watch this happen. You’re making bad choices. How the fuck do you think things will end if you carry on like this?” he pushed. “The lies are affecting all of us, your head has been all over the place recently and it’s not going unnoticed. I will always keep your secrets, boss, but this one isn’t benefiting anyone.” He stepped away from the desk and scrubbed his hand over his face. “I don’t give a shit about her, but you’re only going to push her away the longer you hide this from her. I don’t want to see how that affects you. How it affects us all.”
I pushed away from the desk, straightening up and turning to face the wall behind me. “So I’m supposed to just tell her the truth?” I kept my voice low, not entirely sure what to do with my second’s outburst. I should be disciplining him, but I was curious.
“Maybe not the whole truth, boss.” He matched my tone. “Maybe just the what, keep the why to yourself.”
I hummed a thoughtful sound; he had a point. I didn’t need to explain myself to her, not to anyone. Telling her the truth, even just a partial truth, would most definitely set me back in my pursuit to make her mine. But he was right, if I let it go on much longer, she would want to walk away from me completely when it eventually came out. And it would have to come out soon.
“That was a very risky move, Grey,” I said, spinning back around to face him, finding him still standing opposite me. “Thank you for looking out for The Brotherhood, crossing lines to protect them all, even Mal. It’s one of the reasons that I chose you as my second.” He instantly relaxed, shoulders dropping. “I’ll take your concerns on board.” I sat back down in my chair, and he followed suit.
He stayed silent as I turned my attention to the computer screen and skimmed through my list of tasks that I needed him to complete. I added a couple more to the end of the list and emailed them to him. His phone pinged, notifying me that he had received it, and I reclined back in my chair as he opened and read through.
His face twisted with confusion. “Don’t you think some of these are a bit beneath me, boss?” He met my cold glare.
“No, Grey. You are capable of completing everything on that list, and you will complete them all. You will remember that your place is wherever the fuck I say it is.” A subtle threat lacing my words, a clear punishment for being disrespectful written in the list of tasks. He was lucky to be walking away with that and nothing worse.
He swallowed hard and nodded.
“You’ll check in once each item has been handled,” I instructed, turning my focus to my phone, instantly dismissing him. He got up and went to leave my office. When his hand met the door handle, I spoke again.
“If the truth pushes her too far away it will be on your head, Grey.”
He turned to face me. “But—”
“On. Your. Head.” Death filled my glare as I met his worried eyes. He nodded quickly and made a hasty exit.
It wasn’t his fault that I was keeping this from her, but I’d be damned if I was going to punish myself over it if she couldn’t accept that what I was doing was for the good of the entire Brotherhood.
I looked back down at the phone in my hand and pressed my thumb down, then tapped another button on the screen.
“Boss.” Her velvety voice filled my office and I smiled.
“Come over, Il mio tesoro.”
“On my way, see you in twenty.” Her simple acceptance of my demand, and the seductive purr to her words, had my cock twitching already. It was time to put in some groundwork. Time to make sure that in a few days, when I’d allow her the truth, she wouldn’t hate me with every inch of her being.