Unforgivable Mate of Mine

Chapter XVI

"So Constance, how long have you worked here?"

I was bothering Constrance this afternoon, really couldn't blame me considering how few people I had to interact with. And more than that, I actually liked Constance. She was only a few years older, very reserved but kind. I knew she had a husband and young daughter too.

"Maybe 5 years now."

Long enough, "How'd you start? How do you know the brothers?"

"My husband actually knew them first, they were together at-" she trailed off, as if unable to say more, "But yeah, they knew one another and then I started working here."

That wasn't a lot to go on but I didn't want to pry too heavily, "And you like it here...?"

"Of course, Erik, my husband trusts them, and the pay is good, it's peaceful here...usually."

Usually, except when they kidnapped people like me.

"So they are friends? Erik and them?"

She grinned a little sardonically at that, "I don't know if the brothers have any friends really."

Yeah, that checks out. Villains don't usually make an effort to maintain friendships.

Moving onto safer topics, "Okay tell me more about Erik and baby Eva." Her daughter had just turned 4 and is the cutest thing ever.

Now a gentle smile lit up her face, "She's getting so big, I'll show you pictures in a sec.

And Erik is just so good with her - he works from home so usually looks after her and he genuinely loves it.

I used to think we fell pregnant too quickly after finding one another and it worried me at the start.

But he made it the most easy and wonderful time for me.

Made being a new mom the most natural thing in the world. "

My throat tightened at how she spoke about her husband. So in love.

"He sounds wonderful, and Eva adorable. I wish I could meet them."

"Me too. Maybe in some time?"

Yeah sure, I didn't want to get my hopes up. But not wanting to be a debby-downer I quipped, "Just break me out of here, I'm sure we could come up with a full proof smuggling plan."

She rewarded my dumb joke with a laugh.

"I fear they'd find you no matter where you went."

"You're telling me," I absentmindedly ate the grapes, annoyed at the thought of how impossible escape was.

She paused her food prep, as if holding back from asking something.

"You know you can say anything right, I'm nosy enough in your life that it's only fair."

Biting her lip, "You don't like Arien at all? Only because with mates it's different...And I remember the dinner he prepared...you enjoyed that right?"

She probably didn't understand how I couldn't return his feelings, given how infatuated she was with her perfect mate. And also because of how I'd learnt the mate bond affected werewolves.

But a nice dinner wasn't going to change my mind or my feelings.

When I recalled that day, it had felt nice, good even, but I don't know if any of those feelings were really directed Arien's way.

I tried to cut him some slack but in all honesty, I would've felt the same if it had been anyone else doing something kind for me.

It was more the gesture - the niceness of having an uncomplicated fun day, that had affected me. Made me feel lighter.

"Is it because how everything happened?" She tentatively asked.

That stunned me for a moment, we always carefully avoided the terrible elephant in the room. The beginning of everything. That room.

I shook my head free of it, "No. I guess maybe that's part of it but I honestly don't know how it would've been even if we met somewhere else."

"I admit he's handsome." A sharp laugh rang out from her, "What? A girl has eyes."

They both were. Arien was polished and perfect, whereasS?renwas sharper, harder somehow.

His nose was slightly crooked compared to Arien's perfectly sculpted one - their faces might have been similar when younger but now they just looked like complete opposites.

The same features but arranged differently, everything off by a line.

An edge. Their different experiences and personalities had etched them into something similar yet entirely contrasting.

I don't know who I expected to end up with. I guess I had never really looked for someone to be with, I was just surviving for the moment.

Life had bigger concerns than falling in love. I don't know where I would have even began. Working for a criminal like Zodiac wasn't really conductive to having a normal love life. I'd never even thought what my type to be like.

As if reading my mind, Constance asked, "Then what's your type?"

I reddened, I didn't have one, I didn't have any experience with any of this. I tried to think of past fleeting crushes, "I don't think I even have a type. I was always around thugs to be honest, I remember having a crush on a boxer once."

Again she laughed, "And then?"

"And then nothing. I just watched his matches. He'd beat most everyone to unconsciousness, was pretty disturbing if I think about it now. He never noticed me and I never tried to talk to him. Just bet some money some money on him occasionally."

"Was he at least handsome?'"

"He'd been punched in the face too many times for that, but he was big." Like he could protect me.

She shook her head, "You're so peculiar."

I didn't try to dispute that.

"When you figure out how to bust me out of here, we should watch a match if he's still fighting."

Now she screwed up her face, "No thank you, I'm not one for blood and violence."

I laughed this time, "You're missing out friend."

And she really was a friend, one of the first I'd made in a long time. That made my insides settle.

I headed to the garden, eager to soak in the final afternoon hours of sunlight. I was lost in my head, bits of the conversation with Constance floating though my mind.

Mates. Being trapped. Arien.S?ren. The past few days. My mother.

Even the sunny day didn't seem to dissuade the heavily rising intangible feelings. And before I knew it my mind began to linger on the edge of the yard parameters.

I carefully avoided that area. I hadn't dared go back there, even go near there.

I walked more, heading down my usual paths.

And then feet moving off the path, subconsciously I found myself making my way towards it.

I couldn't explain the compulsion. But I knew it to be there and I felt myself unknowingly following it.

The feeling reminded me of having a loose tooth and still pushing it around with your tongue for a taste of that delicious ache that followed.

I knew it would ache and bleed but right now, I didn't care, I just wanted to see it.

Before I could correct my course, my feet were at the door. To think that this was the same door that I would stare at everyday, dreading my looming fate. The only difference now was that I stood on the other side and was on the brink of trying to get back in.

I don't even think I was in control anymore, my body was simply deciding for me as my mind took a backseat.

My hand reached out, the metal handle cool to the touch. Or maybe I was just burning up. I felt warm suddenly, unbearably so.

What was I doing? I needed to stop this before I spiraled again. Before there was a repeat of yesterday.

But maybe this was precisely how I worked through things.

I knew what I knew, and I knew no one was coming to save me.

Not from this place, not from my mind, not from myself.

I had to figure it out myself and I had to make it better for myself.

Like I always did. This could be shock therapy, exposure therapy or whatever.

Whatever it took to not be weak anymore.

Mind made up, I steeled myself as I slowly pried the door open and took a step forward.

The promise of darkness nearly had me turning around and never returning. It was just so so dark. I remember the absoluteness of it, like molten lead. It even felt constricting.

I shook my head, that was then and I could do this, I'd leave the door open for some light to stream in.

Now I stepped deeper into the murk, my eyes slowly adjusting to the lessened darkness.

My eyes carefully trailed the room, trying to make out the state of it.

And before my brain could catch up to the images formed by my retinas, a scream tore out of me.

I wasn't alone in the room.

I tried to remind myself to breathe, drawing in greedy,shuddering breaths as my brain made sense of what I was looking upon in the darkened room.

It was was hard to tell with so much of the darkened substance coating it...

Darkened substance? My eyes squinted more, unwilling to step any closer.

Blood.

I drew in more shallow breaths as I blinked, frozen in place. My eyes unwillingly roamed across the scene in front of me.

Not only was the limp body completely incapacitated but was also hanging from chains off the wall.

Unable to keep their body supported, the person was being held up by not only the heavy chains and a thick metal cuff around his neck, but each arm splayed wide and legs bound.

Upon closer inspection, what first seemed to be handcuffs were metal rods grotesquely stuck through each wrist holding them in place.

The final realisation caused my stomach to lurch as I spewed its contents on the floor. I fell to my knees, trying not to faint in this wretched place.

My now empty stomach did nothing to lesson the sickened feeling which remained as I looked up from my knees.

The body had shifted and was now painfully groaning. I strained to make out the words.

"No Arien, please no...stop...no," a mere whisper of deeply pained sound escaped. My body was wracked by dry heaves as this new realisation sunk in.

Arien had done this.

The only person in this place who I actually thought was safe when it came to actual violence. Or at least normal. Arien was just as evil, maybe more, than I could ever imagine.

I was so so wrong. No one was safe. Nowhere was safe here.

I had to help this person. Tears blurred my vision as I regained my footing and tried to reign in my panic as I figured out how to get them down from the wall.

My hands reached out, forcing myself to resist the rising bile as I felt the stickiness of blood coating them. I pulled at the chains, trying to find the start, somewhere to unhook them. I didn't dare think about what I would do about the rods yet.

My plan abruptly came to a halt as I froze, feeling someone enter the room.

I swung around to face the intruder.

S?ren.

No, he'd stop me. He'd leave this person here to continue suffering in this despicable state. Like he'd wanted to leave me.

"Get out." My voice shook as I let out a halfway scream, more of a frenzied shriek.

And then I took a step back and raised my hand in a halting motion. Only for me to notice the red stain that now covered my fingers.

Blood.

Blood.

Blood.

And once again I could no longer breathe, as a wailing sound reached my ears. It was loud. So loud and I could feel myself shake in response. Where was it coming from and why could I no longer draw sufficient oxygen in?

I furiously wiped at my tear stained face, which only caused the wailing to get louder as I realised the blood would now be on my face. Was the room shaking or was I?

Everything was so out of my control. All that was clear was my panic and the loud loud ringing.

I was momentarily silenced as arms found their way around me. Freezing me in place.

The wailing gradually receded, was it in my head or was it leaking from me? I could not tell. My shaking did the same as I felt myself caged in, held together. At least for a mere moment.

For a mere moment I welcomed this anchorage, if only for now.

But too promptly my body seemed to recall who it was, and who we were and how we got here. And once again, I was fighting against the arms that held me.

"Don't touch me!" I hoarsely shouted out as I struggles and flailed wildly to no success. I fought desperately while he simply held me, not allowing for an inch of leeway.

And then I felt myself being lifted and my last measure of control being taken away as he carried me outside.

My tears and struggle furiously continued, my voice hoarse from the screams and cries.

Finally I stilled again, with no fight left, no strength left. I fell silent and still.

He paused for a moment to ascertain what the sudden change in behaviour meant, allowing me to take my chance and grab hold of his arm.

Wildly I bit down.