Chapter 31
Julian
“Why do I feel like the one who got a gift?” I wrap my arms around her and squeeze.
“Mmmm.” She sighs next to me.
“You tired? Sleepy?”
“Not really. Just relaxed. You?”
“Same. But thirsty. Want some water?”
“Sure, thanks.”
I get up, snag my boxers from the floor, slip them on and head to the kitchen.
When I return with two glasses of water, Ever is coming out of the bathroom with my T-shirt on.
It barely covers her ass. It’s now officially my favorite shirt, as long as she’s wearing it just like that.
My phone vibrates on the nightstand. It’s my alarm tone.
“You’re officially out of high school. Congratulations, Ever. ”
“Thanks, Julie. Um, you set an alarm?”
“I did.” Why do I feel embarrassed by this? “I wanted to make sure we commemorated the occasion,” I add shyly.
“Did I tell you how much I liked my gift?” She, on the other hand, is less shy around me, and I love that she seems more her authentic self.
“I think you did. And even if you didn’t, I got the impression you enjoyed it.”
“I did. I didn’t think I was supposed to.”
My eyebrow arches at her comment.
“You know, you hear the horror stories.” She sits down on my bed and crosses her legs, looking very much at home, to my delight.
I sit down facing her, one leg half curled in front of me, the other hanging off the side with my foot resting on the floor.
I reach for her and place my hand flat on her thigh.
The index finger of my other hand draws lazy circles around her ankle on the opposite leg.
I lean in and kiss her lightly on the lips.
I couldn’t stop touching her right now with a gun to my head.
As if she can read my mind, she asks, “So, can we do it again?”
With a half laugh, half groan, I reach my hands under her ass and hoist her up onto my lap.
She instinctively straddles me, wrapping her legs around me. Her hands toy with the buzzed hair above the back of my neck, sending goose bumps down my arms and heat to my groin. She presses into me lightly, causing my dick to twitch.
“Uhhh, I don’t want to hurt you.”
Her eyelids drop with the faint nod of her head.
I lift her chin with my finger and thumb. “Ever, believe me when I say I want you every second of every day. We just need to . . . go slow at first. Okay?”
Her nod this time is less subtle. She adds a half-crooked smile to go with it.
I pull her lips to mine with the slight grip I have on her chin. Her tongue finds mine eagerly as her hands clench my neck. She grinds on me roughly and I feel her whole body tense. Her tongue freezes. She scoots herself back from my quickly hardening crotch.
I know it must’ve hurt her, which causes a pit in my stomach.
She tries to start kissing me again, but I stop her. “Hey. Let’s go sit in the hot tub.”
“Okay.”
She’s shy and unsure of herself again.
I hate it, because she’s perfect. I want her to never feel less than perfect.
I stand and bring her with me, setting her on the ground facing me.
“The hot tub will make . . . ease any soreness you may have.” I feel my face flushing, but I continue because I hate that she might be in any pain at all because of me.
“And it won’t always feel that way after. Just the first time, as far as I know.”
“Okay.”
“Ever.”
“Julie.”
“Look at me.”
She looks up under her lashes.
My gut clenches at how young and fragile she looks, half shadowed in the moonlight.
I want to protect her from every shitty thing this world might throw at her.
Except me. I selfishly won’t save her from me.
But I can try to make her happy. And I will try.
I promise myself that. “You’re the most beautiful and perfect girl I’ve ever seen in my life.
I can’t even describe how beautiful—inside and out.
Don’t think for one second that I don’t want you—”
“Every second of every day?” She interrupts me with her signature sass.
I love this girl.
That thought slams into my brain without warning. I quickly turn from her in case my face gives away the shock it prompted. Clutching her hand, I snag two robes from the closet, head through the slider, and out to the hot tub.
I leave the outdoor lights off. The moon illuminates our way as steam billows toward the sky when I lift the lid. Still holding her hand, I guide her shirt up over her head and drop it on a nearby chair, leading her up the steps and down into the tub. Once I sink in next to her, I ask “Jets?”
She opts for the silence.
I like that. Although the crickets are loud and conversations from campers waft up to us every so often, it’s still quiet.
Her sigh flutters my heart. She leans her head back and gazes up at the sky looking utterly content.
I reach for her and run my finger down the side of her neck from behind her ear.
She turns her angelic face to me and flashes the sweetest smile.
The flutter becomes a hammer. She ducks under the surface and pops up in front of me.
Slithering onto my lap, she straddles me on her knees.
Ever is gorgeous any day. Ever gleaming wet in the moonlight?
Drop-dead. I swallow as she inches her face toward mine.
My shy girl is nowhere to be found. The warm, wet heat must agree with her body.
She tilts her head and locks her parted lips on mine, delving in with her tongue. She strokes mine, in and out. Much like the way I plunged in and out of her earlier. It sends a message straight to my cock.
My hands travel down her naked body, curving around both cheeks of her ass.
I pull her toward me, my erection flat against her navel.
Before she can grind herself on me, I reach between us and draw light circles until she’s panting in my ear and biting my neck.
I know she’s never done any of this before, so her response to me is even more of a turn-on.
“Please,” she breathes into my ear, pressing into my hand.
I keep teasing her sensitive bud and slip a finger inside her.
Her teeth scrape the sensitive skin on my neck on her sharp inhale.
“Too much?”
“No. Don’t. Ung. Stop.”
I oblige gently until it’s not enough.
She grips my bicep in a now familiar unspoken “more.”
I lift her out of the water, drape a robe carelessly over her shoulders and cradle her as I walk us back inside.
Laying her down on the robe on the bed, I waste no time kissing down her body until I get to the center of her heat.
There I kiss her softly at first, then increase the intensity.
Slipping a finger inside her, I curl the tip up toward me over and over.
Combined with the circles my tongue draws on her clit, she bows off the bed and clasps her hands around my head. The sound she makes as she comes is part moan, part cry and utterly primal.
I could almost explode watching her come undone. I want inside her so badly, but I want to give her body some time. When she settles down, still panting a little, I stretch out next to her and blow softly on the side of her neck where her wet hair clings to her skin.
She rolls to face me and reaches down to touch me, shyly at first. Then she wraps her hand around my head and squeezes a little, like she’s unsure of herself.
I take her hand in mine and interlock our fingers. “It’s okay, Ever. You don’t have to.”
“Julie, stop being so careful with me.” When I don’t immediately respond, she adds, “Okay?” She traces a fingernail around the hollow heart tattoo.
“So what if I’m sore? Maybe it hurts in a good way.
” Her fingernail lightly follows the trail of hair down until it’s grazing the head of my dick.
Her voice is barely a whisper. “I want to be good for you too. Show me?” She looks up from under her lashes. “Please.”
I bring her hand to my lips and kiss her palm.
“Ever? The way you feel? That’s how I feel.
You feel so good to me. Whatever we do .
. . or don’t do.” But I want to give her what she wants, because I want it too.
I stand from the bed and lean my knees on the edge of the mattress and hold my hand out to her.
She takes it and kneels on the bed in front of me.
I place her hand lightly around me and guide it along my hard length.
She touches her lips to the head of my dick, then peeks her tongue out between her lips and grazes the opening and the sensitive underside.
I arch at the intensity. I want her to know how good this feels.
Running my fingers through her hair, my thumb draws circles around her ear.
She opens her mouth and sinks her lips down my shaft, ripping a groan from my throat.
I feel the tip touch the back of her throat and hiss through my teeth.
I tug a handful of her hair back, encouraging her to slide her lips back.
She does and then plunges them around me again.
Over and over, I watch her cheeks hollow with each effort until I can’t take it anymore.
With my palms under her jaw, I bring her lips to mine and kiss her until we’re both panting.
I lay her back onto the bed and settle myself between her legs.
I dip my finger into her and find her wet and ready.
I stretch to reach a condom on the nightstand and tear it open with my teeth.
She takes it from my hand, so I help her guide it on the tip of my dick and roll it down my shaft before I edge myself into her and sink.
She squeezes my ass with both hands, urging me deeper.
I resist, bracing my arms on each side of her, supporting my weight.
A frustrated groan escapes her lips. She wraps her legs tight around me and tries to roll us so that she’s on top.
With a quiet laugh, I let her. When she’s sitting on top of me, still joined together, I lift her hips a little and slide out of her, then lower her slowly until she gasps.
I know she doesn’t get that it’s more intense with her on top.
But I want her to feel empowered, like she’s in control.
Once I’m completely sheathed, I hold her hips still.
She tries to arch up again, but I hold her steady, then I rock her hips back and forth.
I feel her clit on my pelvic bone. Her guttural gasp tells me she likes this.
I do it again. She takes over, rocking, gasping until she’s on the edge.
I use my thumb to coax her over as she cries out and collapses on me, convulsing around me, and I realize I’m shaking.
I hold her until her breathing calms. Her orgasm slicks over me.
I know any pain will be minimal now. I lift her head to look at me and kiss her softly.
“Hi, Ever.”
“Hi, Julie.” She smiles so sweetly.
I raise her hips and drop her down suddenly and completely on me.
Her mouth makes a perfect, mind-numbing O as her cry rips through the silent room.
She quickly lifts her hips and drops her ass down on me again, harder.
I let her set the rhythm and she does. She drives me up into her over and over until I can’t breathe.
All I see is her body moving up and down on me and I can’t control myself.
I grab her hips and bury myself deep inside her with one final thrust as my orgasm pulses into her.
And I feel her walls tighten around me and contract again as she collapses on me, kissing my chest, my nipples, my tattoo.
As our orgasms subside, she rests her face against my neck, her soft breaths creating moisture there.
I nuzzle into her lips, and she rewards me with light kisses.
How is she so perfect? She knows exactly what I want in this moment and she’s brand new at this.
It’s like she was made just for me. Even though I know that can’t be true because I don’t deserve her or this.
It won’t stop me from having it though. I can’t deny her, even if I wanted to.
I’m putty in her hands, but she’s too innocent to know that.
Her breathing evens out and I dip my chin to look at her face.
She’s asleep. And if tonight and everything we shared wasn’t enough to do it, this exquisite creature sound asleep, spent from her first night of sex, splayed out on top of me surely did it.
The heart I was convinced I no longer had fell out of my chest and lay bleeding on the floor at her feet.
She could break me if she wanted. Destroy me.
Even more than my past has already tried.
Slowly and silently, I shift with her in my arms onto our sides and pull the edge of the comforter around us. In seconds, I follow her into sleep.