Chapter 29
Farrah
Ithink someone stabbed a pencil into my brain.
Ughhhh.
I try to roll over, but the weight across my waist doesn’t allow me to move.
I freeze. My heart starts to pound as I take stock of my body.
My pain is in my head, not my face, and the only time Alex held on to me this way is after he felt the need to stake his claim.
Nothing in my lower half is sore. I don’t understand what’s happening.
“Good morning, Princess.” The deep rumbling voice makes me look over my shoulder. The second I register that Knox is behind me, not my ex, my entire body melts into the mattress. Jesus, I haven’t woken up that afraid in years.
I try to remember the events of last night that led to Knox being in my bed. I can’t quite fit the pieces together. I’m not mad about it, especially given that I’m still wearing my dress. I just don’t know how we got here.
“Hi,” I whisper.
“How are you feeling?”
I turn over to face him. “Like I drank an entire vat of vodka.”
Knox snorts, wrapping his arm tighter around my waist to pull me into his bare chest. I snuggle in, happy he’s not making this any weirder than it already is for me. He’s so toasty. “That’s because you made your best effort to do just that. How much do you remember?”
I scrunch my face, thinking back to my last memory. “You carried me out to the truck and…” I trail off as the memory of moving the console and spilling the contents everywhere comes back. “I’m sorry.”
“What exactly are you sorry for?” His soft question holds no judgment.
There are so many things that run through my head.
I could apologize for spilling the contents of his console, for freaking out afterward, for falling asleep on him, for likely making him stay the night.
But none of them feel right, so I say, “For making you take care of me last night. I can’t imagine I made it easy on you. ”
His soft smile sends butterflies fluttering in my belly. “You know, I actually enjoyed it. I felt honored that you trusted me enough to do it.”
I tilt my head back. “I do. Trust you that is. I haven’t had that much to drink in a very long time. I didn’t feel safe enough to.”
“I’m glad I could do that for you.” Knox leans in to kiss me, and I pull away with a grimace.
“My mouth tastes like a dirty sock. Can I brush my teeth first?”
“Princess, I’m a cowboy. There ain’t much that grosses me out.” The smirk on his face makes me roll my eyes, so I lean in to kiss it off him.
He wasn’t ready for it, and I’m able to pull away before he can kiss me back.
I start to get out of bed, but Knox yanks me back with an easy flex of his arm.
It shocks a laugh out of me, and I find myself grinning up at the handsome cowboy.
He’s pinned my hips down with his own, while the rest of his weight is on his elbows, by my head.
He still has his jeans on, which I find endearing.
“Now let’s try that kiss again.” Knox drops his head, kissing me with passion. I lift my hands to his hair, needing something to keep me grounded. It’s overwhelming how quickly this man can send my body into overdrive. If I’m not careful, I could get addicted to this feeling.
I think I already am.
Knox makes me feel as if my pleasure is the only thing that matters. He gets pleasure out of ensuring that I feel good. I’m not just a body to be used however it pleases him. I’m a vital piece of the puzzle, and without my full participation, it would be pointless for him.
I never imagined a man would ever act that way toward me.
I can fantasize about my book boyfriends all day long, but at the end of the day, they’re fictional. Gia gave me hope that those men are out there. She made it clear that Holt makes her very happy in that department.
I just couldn’t believe that I would be brave enough to find a man like that of my own.
“Come back to me, Princess,” Knox murmurs against my neck. He presses kisses up to my ear and down my jaw until he reaches my mouth again.
“I’m here. I promise.”
“What are you thinking about?”
“How lucky I am to have found a man like you.”
Knox lifts his head. A crease forms between his eyebrows. “I don’t want you to get the wrong idea about me, Princess.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m a grumpy bastard. I always will be, even if you make me happier than I’ve ever been. I just don’t see the world the way you do.”
I snort at his description of himself. “I’m aware of that, Knox. I don’t expect you to turn into Grayson now that we’re…doing whatever we’re doing.”
He gives me a flat look that makes me laugh harder. “I sure as hell will never be like Gray. The man’s a menace.”
“Speaking of, remind me to ask about him and Kylie later. But the point I’m getting at is I don’t want you to be anyone but you because you’re a good man, an amazing dad, and someone I truly want to have in my life.”
“Are you sure? I was such an asshole to you. What if I do something stupid again?”
I shrug. “You probably will. Just like I’ll piss you off to no end as well. The thing we have to decide is if we’re willing to work through those moments together. We have to be a team even when we fight.”
“I’ve never felt like I was part of a team in a relationship.”
“Me neither. But I sure as heck know what it doesn’t look like, so I think we might have a good shot at making this work.”
“Are you sure this is what you want? You’re not just taking on me, you’ll be taking on an almost seven-year-old too.”
“I’m sure.”
“Then I’ll stop trying to talk you out of it.”
I grin. “Good. Now, I need some aspirin and a giant cup of coffee.”
“You go get ready, I’ll work on coffee and breakfast.”
“You’ve got yourself a deal.”
* * *
“Mmm. That smells good.” I peek over Knox’s shoulder and am shocked to see two breakfast sandwiches on the counter. I didn’t even know I had the stuff to make those. Let’s just say I’m good enough in the kitchen to survive. Any more than that and I’m out.
“There’s coffee over there. The blue one is yours. I thought you might want to go pick Finn up with me.”
My eyebrows lift. “Really? You’re not ready to get rid of me?”
Knox softens, pinching my chin with his thumb and forefinger. “I spent all last week denying my instinct to spend time with you. I’m not doing that again.”
I lift on my toes to kiss him. “Good.”
We’re in Knox’s truck a few minutes later. I’m in heaven, eating this sandwich and falling even harder for Knox because he knew exactly how I take my coffee. I’d ask him how he knew that, but I don’t want to ruin the magic. “I could eat one of these every day.”
“I could listen to you eat that every day. Do you have any idea what you do to me?” Knox drops his hand to his jeans to adjust himself.
My cheeks flame. “I’m sorry?”
He chuckles. “No, you aren’t.”
“No, not really.”
Reaching over, he squeezes my bare thigh.
It sends a tingle of desire up to my center.
As annoyed as I was about the distance Knox put between us this week, it helped me slowly wrap my head around how different this relationship will be.
I’ve never experienced pleasure like I did that night.
It’s made me want more, but it also terrified me.
What will it be like when we’re fully naked together?
We had all our clothes on, and I came harder than I ever had before.
If I have all of Knox’s attention on me when there’s nothing between us, I might just die right there.
I want it more than I can say, but I’m still not sure I’m ready.
I trust Knox to take care of me in every way that matters. He’s not the problem. It’s me that’s getting in my own way.
And I have no idea how to move.