Chapter Twenty-Two August 8 #2
I don’t respond. Even though I believe her.
Even though I understand. Even though I’ve lived a version of it myself.
Because hearing her call it emotional abuse stings my heart.
I never thought of it that way. I just thought my dad was the way he was because…
just because. And that’s probably what he wanted.
He wanted us to accept his words, his beliefs, as truth.
Our truths. Since that was the way it had always been, and that was the way it would always remain. Until someone broke the cycle.
Georgie puts the bottle down and tries to burp a half-awake Paulie.
“Even if there are moments when he softens his exterior for me, they are fleeting, and they’ll never fix the hurt he’s caused.
It is what it is.” Her lips form a straight, tight line as Paulie releases a tiny burp.
“And you know what? It’s okay, because I’m getting married, and I’m going to start my new life with Zach.
I’m going to raise Paulie to be whoever she wants to be.
To love whoever she wants to love. To never have to feel an ounce of the shame that we both grew up with.
” As Georgie rises with Paulie I gather all her things, placing the diaper bag on her shoulder.
“I will not make my trauma hers. It ends here.”
She begins to walk toward Theo’s sliding doors but stops and turns back to me, Paulie’s head resting on her shoulder.
“You’re never going to please them. No matter what you do. It’s never going to be enough. So you may as well do whatever the hell you want anyway.”
I nod and give her a forced smile. The three years between us feel more like lifetimes.
Theo slides open his bedroom door for Georgie. He places a gentle kiss on Paulie’s forehead before walking out to the patio.
“Hey,” he says, smiling.
It feels nice knowing that smile is just for me. His presence instantly eases the heaviness of my interaction with Georgie.
Theo is in his swim trunks, holding a towel and the baby monitor. “Is it too late?” He nods to the pool.
“No.” I shake my head and allow my own smile to come through. “I was actually hoping you’d show up.”
“Really?” He wiggles his brows obnoxiously. “Are you saying you enjoy my company, Hadid?”
I could be obnoxious right back and continue playing that game where we banter, masking deeper emotions, but in this moment, I’m happy that Theo is standing here and that we’re going to spend the afternoon together.
“You know I do.”
He puts the baby monitor and his towel down before taking a step toward me. He points a finger at me before booping my nose. “I knew I’d get under your skin eventually.”
“This is why I don’t give you compliments. It just feeds your already massive ego.”
“To go with my massive muscles,” he jokes, kissing his biceps.
Deciding I’ve had enough with niceties, I push him into the pool. He goes down with a resounding splash.
When he resurfaces, his body glistens under the strong August sun. He runs his hands through his thick, black hair, and a stirring from deep inside freezes me in place. Water droplets stream down his face and drip onto his tanned chest.
A sudden yearning takes over.
It’s like someone has finally removed the blinders and I can see what’s been in front of me all summer. Theo Petropolis. All six feet of lean muscle, big brown eyes, and a smile that could end wars.
I dive into the pool, skimming close to the bottom, hoping the coolness of the water will extinguish these intense new feelings. Resurfacing, I swipe strands of wet hair away from my face.
“You pushed me in before I had a chance to put on sunblock,” Theo says, treading water in front of me.
I flutter my eyes at him playfully while pouting. “I’m sorry.”
“You know I’m a sucker when you do that.”
“Do what?” I ask, even though I know exactly what it is I’m doing.
“Act like a girl.”
“Please. I’m nothing more to you than a sparring partner who sucks at math,” I say, floating on my back and squeezing my eyes shut at the bright sun rays.
From the front of the house comes the sound of a car pulling away. I switch to treading water. “Did everybody just leave to go meet the vendors?”
He nods. “Yep.”
“Wow. My parents must really trust you.”
“Why?” he asks, swimming around me like a shark.
“Stop that,” I say, splashing him. He pulls back, treading water across from me again. “Because they left me here. With you. Alone. I guess they don’t see you as a threat.”
“Should they?” he asks, moving in closer.
“I haven’t decided yet.”
His cheeks redden, and I dive under the water again, swimming the length of the pool and back.
He meets me at the back corner of the pool where I’ve got one hand on the coping, catching my breath.
Theo tilts his head. “What’re you thinking, Hadid?”
I smile, looking him up and down. “I’m thinking about how I’m starting to hate it less and less when you call me Hadid.” I bite my lower lip, glancing around us. “It’s pretty secluded here. I mean, you wouldn’t even know you had neighbors with all the tall trees and spaced-out homes.”
“Yeah?”
“Have you ever…you know?”
He studies my face. “No. I don’t know.”
“Skinny-dipped?” I whisper.
“All the time.” He answers like it’s no big deal. “Have you?”
“No. Never. I never even thought about it until right this second.”